Chapter 11 – матрёшка 11
Xu RenDong was unable to judge what Yuan XueMing meant by “lied” for a while so he remained silent, hiding his expression in the darkness.
Yuan XueMing took a deep puff of smoke and narrowed his eyes in satisfaction. He blew out a circular puff with great enjoyment and then said slowly: “You are definitely not a newcomer.”
Xu RenDong thought for a while and said, “Yes, this is my…fourth time.”
This time, his mouth did not lock up. It wasn’t sealed like before. So he understood that he could not tell others about the rebirth after death but he could lie.
Yuan XueMing nodded: “No wonder you’re so calm, you turned out to be a fourth-time veteran.” He handed over a lighter, lit a cigarette for Xu RenDong and then enjoyed his own tobacco.
The two of them smoked at the window together in silence. Although it was something harmful to the body, it eased their tight nerves and made this deadly night less difficult.
Xu RenDong asked: “Why do you have insomnia?”
Yuan XueMing replied: “In the real world, I’m lying in the ICU 24 hours a day. I really slept too much. Now that I have the opportunity, I want to walk and move around as much as possible.”
Xu RenDong said in surprise: “You mean you are seriously ill and bedridden but in here you’re healthy?” He looked at Yuan XueMing again and found that his cheeks were sunken, his eye circles were black and his complexion was slightly bluish. In the dim yellow light, he really did look sick.
After entering this world, Yuan XueMing’s mental and physical strength were normal in all aspects so no one thought about it and only assumed he hadn’t slept well. Who could have imagined that he was lying in the intensive care unit in reality?
Yuan XueMing smiled and said: “It’s more than a serious illness. I’m actually dying. Only in this world of ghosts and monsters do I have a personality. Once I leave and return to the real world, I will fall into a coma again.” He stroked his neck with his finger and mimicked making an incision, “Tracheal intubation, have you heard of it? It requires general anesthesia.”
Xu RenDong saw him making gestures on his neck and was immediately reminded of his bad memories. His back was suddenly cold and he always felt that someone would stretch out their hands from behind, drag him into the darkness and then slit his throat.
He couldn’t help but glance backwards. He happened to see Lian Qiao sleeping peacefully in the bed from the crack of the opened door. For some reason, his heart suddenly calmed down. If felt as if, as long as Lian Qiao was behind him, then he didn’t need to be scared.
Xu RenDong asked, “What illness do you have?”
“Multiple organ failure.” Yuan XueMing smiled. When his cigarette burned out, he took another cigarette from the cigarette case and lit it. Under the faint moonlight, Xu RenDong could see that the cigarette was some kind of expensive brand. Yuan XueMing continued, “Actually, I should have died a long time ago but my family couldn’t let me go so I was pushed into the ICU. My heart, lungs, and kidneys are all no longer good. Every day I have red blood cells, platelets and albumin infusions, relying on these things to hang onto my life. Don’t even mention it, I’m at the best hospital in the country, the best ICU, the technology is really good. Even my body, which is rotten from the inside out, has dragged on for several months. It’s great to be rich.”
Xu RenDong suddenly didn’t know what to say.
“Guess what I was thinking about when I saw the elevator for the first time?” Yuan XueMing’s tone was calm and even a little humorous. “I thought: The Underworld is really advancing with the times now and even sent an elevator to pick people up to go to hell. … I never expected that the elevator did send me to hell but it’s not the kind of hell I imagined.”
Xu RenDong asked, “When was the first time you entered the elevator?”
Yuan XueMing turned his head and glanced at him, revealing a gentle but helpless smile: “Young man, did you know that there are two types of general anesthesia; deep anesthesia and light anesthesia? Deep anesthesia is complete anesthesia, just like going to sleep completely, people are totally unaware of their surroundings. And light anesthesia just allows you to not feel pain. Your body can’t move but your consciousness is still clear.”
Xu RenDong was taken aback. This didn’t answer his question but the implications made him feel terrified.
Yuan XueMing looked at the snowfield outside the window and slowly said: “Every morning, you can hear the doctors and nurses doing their hand-over and hear them walk around. The interns will practice on you. Although the needle sticks don’t hurt, you can hear them discuss how come they can’t find the blood vessels yet, whether they should change direction or not. There’s always people needing to get rescued in the middle of the night. You can hear the doctor on duty doing CPR, all of them panting and tired to death. Whether or not that patient has been successfully rescued or has been relieved from this world, you will have to wait for the next day to find out. Although the person with light anesthesia is conscious, it is still anesthesia after all. You will feel dizzy and the soul seems like it’s floating outside the body. It is connected to the instrument by the infusion tubes. You just wait and wait in a daze, you can hear everything, know everything, just like you are having a lucid dream. You can’t feel the presence of your body… but you are awake.” He paused, his smile finally revealed a little sadness, “Think about it, in this state, how could I remember the first time I got into the elevator? When was it?”
Xu RenDong was silent. Yuan XueMing smiled and said, “So in fact, I am still a little grateful for this ghost world. Although it is easy to die here, only here can I feel that I am a person again and that I am still alive.”
His cigarette ran out again. So he took out the third cigarette. Xu RenDong forgot that there was still a cigarette in his hand and at this time the cigarette butt almost burned to his fingers. He simply pinched the cigarette and felt a little complicated for a moment. He lowered his eyes and said, “Take that doll with you and don’t give it to others.”
Yuan XueMing said, “I know, this doll will save my life.”
Xu RenDong was surprised. Yuan XueMing explained: “If you play a lot, you will have a general understanding of the routines here. Like this kind of key prop, it will either kill you or save you. Since the two who died yesterday didn’t have a doll on them, then it proves that the doll can be used to save lives.”
Xu RenDong suddenly felt cold. He remembered that in the last reincarnation, Jiang Li accused Yuan XueMing of using a newcomer to test the conditions of death. At that time, he thought it was Jiang Li who was out of control and overly suspicious but now it seems that Yuan XueMing clearly had such thoughts.
Xu RenDong’s voice couldn’t help but also became cold: “Then why didn’t you tell everyone?”
Yuan XueMing smiled and shook his head: “You are still inexperienced. What’s the use of telling them? There are only three dolls in total but our team has a total of more than a dozen people. Speak out so everyone will fight each other and shed blood? Everyone wants to save their own life. My life is close to an end. Some people here are young and vigorous, with a lot of life to live. Others, like Xu Hong, can’t die even though she tries so hard. Things are just so strange and fickle. Who can make sense of it?” {He’s pointing out that Xu Hong often does things which make people feel like she should be the first one to die; get angry, go off on her own etc etc, not that she actually wants to die or anything.}
Xu RenDong’s face was cold and he didn’t say a thing. This didn’t anger Yuan XueMing. Instead, he patted him on the shoulder and said in an elder’s cordial tone: “You are still young, maybe you can’t accept this but these are the facts. This is destiny.”
Xu RenDong couldn’t help thinking: Then why is my destiny to die repeatedly? Why me, why only me?
What did I do wrong to have to go through all this pain?
Yuan XueMing saw that his face was very bad and comforted him: “Don’t worry. We are also destined. If I find a doll again, I will definitely give it to you.”
Xu RenDong resisted and said coldly: “No need.”
Yuan XueMing smiled. “So you and your little friend already have a matryoshka?”
Xu RenDong was shocked. He immediately realized that he was being tricked into revealing something and his expression couldn’t help but change. Yuan XueMing saw his reaction, laughed and said: “… Didn’t I say it? You still lack experience. It’s okay not to want to harm anyone else but you can’t not be on the defence. You should be more careful from now on.”
After he said that, he paced away leisurely and left Xu RenDong alone in the corridor in a complicated mood.
Is Yuan XueMing an enemy or a friend? He still couldn’t tell.
Are these old-timers who have experienced the world of ghosts so unfathomable? Jiang Li, Wang Yuan, Yuan XueMing… all of them are very contemplative, plotting every step. If it were not for the ability to reset the world, Xu RenDong would probably die without knowing how he died.
—So how about Lian Qiao?
Xu RenDong felt his heart constrict and his chest felt uncomfortable. He opened the door and returned to the bed and saw Lian Qiao was still asleep. Lian Qiao slept like an unsuspecting baby, even smacking his lips, like there was a sweet aftertaste in his mouth. There was also a smile at the corner of his lips.
Suddenly, Xu RenDong had a very familiar feeling, which made him feel more relieved. There wasn’t any reason to think Lian Qiao wasn’t trustworthy.
Lian Qiao was the only one who he could trust.
For the first time in his life, Xu RenDong decided to abandon his reason and trust his instincts.
The next day, Xu RenDong slept in on a rare occasion. He was awakened by Lian Qiao. Lian Qiao told him anxiously that it was noisy outside and that something might have happened again. “Let’s go out and have a look.”
Xu RenDong had anticipated this. He stood up and said: “Okay.”
Sure enough, everyone in the hallway was gathered in front of the door to a certain room. They were whispering to each other and their expressions were not very good. Yuan XueMing was among them and he smiled at Xu RenDong. Xu RenDong looked away in silence.
It was the two girls who died this time, the two who stared at Xu RenDong last night but never dared to talk to him. Xu RenDong naturally didn’t understand the thoughts of these girls. He only felt that now that they were dead, it was really pitiful to be stared at and commented on by everyone.
The laughter last night was like an anesthetic and everyone deliberately forgot that they were still in danger. But now, death has come again to shatter everyone’s dreams. Uneasy emotions once again spread in everyone’s hearts.
Someone collapsed and yelled questioningly: “What are the conditions for ghosts to kill? If this continues, we will all be killed before we can gather all the dolls!”
Xu Hong sneered, staring at Yuan XueMing and said: “Who knows? Didn’t he say that the conditions in each world are different?”
Yuan XueMing ignored her provocation and said, “Let’s go to the east to search today. I still think that the most important thing is to finish the task as soon as possible and leave.”
Everyone had no objections so they packed their bags and prepared to go out and explore.
Xu RenDong and Lian Qiao also returned to their room. Lian Qiao silently stuffed the crowbar into the backpack and then showed a somewhat hesitant expression, looking at him eagerly.
Xu RenDong asked: “What’s the matter?”
Lian Qiao said, “Brother RenDong, the four people who died yesterday and today have one thing in common, that is they didn’t find a matryoshka. Do you think…”
Xu RenDong didn’t expect Lian Qiao to guess the conditions of death so quickly. He thought for a while and felt that there was no need to hide from Lian Qiao, so he nodded: “I also think that the death condition is probably this. Actually, I heard the conversation between the rabbit and the two girls last night.” He couldn’t tell Lian Qiao that he had experienced death several times so he could only lie. “I heard the rabbit ask them if they had found a matryoshka.”
Lian Qiao’s expression changed: “Then they just…?”
Xu RenDong said, “Yeah. “
Lian Qiao frowned, his expression getting more and more solemn. Xu RenDong thought he was scared so he soothed: “Don’t worry, I actually found a matryoshka long ago and put one on you. The two of us should be okay for now.”
Lian Qiao opened his eyes in surprise. He fumbled around on his body and really found a matryoshka. This was the one in the basement, it was only a little bigger than the smallest doll so Xu RenDong was able to hide on him without him knowing it.
Lian Qiao pinched the doll in his hand and poked it in the face with his fingers. He whispered: “Brother RenDong, when did you hide it? Why didn’t I know about it?”
Xu RenDong said, “While you were sleeping.”
Lian Qiao suddenly snorted and covered his face: “While the ignorant boy was asleep, the man beside him actually did that to him…”
Xu RenDong: “…” What the hell was this silly boy going on about?
Lian Qiao moved his finger slightly, and quietly glanced at him from the gap between his fingers: “Brother RenDong, you are so good to me. Do you by any chance have a longstanding secret crush on me?”
Xu RenDong thought seriously and said, “No.”
Lian Qiao: “Oh.” He put down his hands in disappointment.
Xu RenDong looked at him and suddenly remembered the night when they first met, Lian Qiao called it the “imprinting effect”. He was saved by him and he happened to be the first person he met in this world so Lian Qiao relied on him like a newborn baby bird and trusted him.
That happened a long time ago and this time Lian Qiao couldn’t remember it anymore. After the world was reset, Lian Qiao’s memory of him was also erased. Nothing was left.
But Xu RenDong still remembers.
So he looked into Lian Qiao’s eyes and said seriously: “I treat you well because you are the first little bird I have encountered in this world.”
Lian Qiao was taken aback for a moment and subconsciously looked down somewhere. He looked and then muttered: “I’m not that little.”
Xu RenDong: “…” Young man, why are your thoughts so dirty?
***
Chapter 11 – матрёшка 11
Xu RenDong was unable to judge what Yuan XueMing meant by “lied” for a while so he remained silent, hiding his expression in the darkness.
Yuan XueMing took a deep puff of smoke and narrowed his eyes in satisfaction. He blew out a circular puff with great enjoyment and then said slowly: “You are definitely not a newcomer.”
Xu RenDong thought for a while and said, “Yes, this is my…fourth time.”
This time, his mouth did not lock up. It wasn’t sealed like before. So he understood that he could not tell others about the rebirth after death but he could lie.
Yuan XueMing nodded: “No wonder you’re so calm, you turned out to be a fourth-time veteran.” He handed over a lighter, lit a cigarette for Xu RenDong and then enjoyed his own tobacco.
The two of them smoked at the window together in silence. Although it was something harmful to the body, it eased their tight nerves and made this deadly night less difficult.
Xu RenDong asked: “Why do you have insomnia?”
Yuan XueMing replied: “In the real world, I’m lying in the ICU 24 hours a day. I really slept too much. Now that I have the opportunity, I want to walk and move around as much as possible.”
Xu RenDong said in surprise: “You mean you are seriously ill and bedridden but in here you’re healthy?” He looked at Yuan XueMing again and found that his cheeks were sunken, his eye circles were black and his complexion was slightly bluish. In the dim yellow light, he really did look sick.
After entering this world, Yuan XueMing’s mental and physical strength were normal in all aspects so no one thought about it and only assumed he hadn’t slept well. Who could have imagined that he was lying in the intensive care unit in reality?
Yuan XueMing smiled and said: “It’s more than a serious illness. I’m actually dying. Only in this world of ghosts and monsters do I have a personality. Once I leave and return to the real world, I will fall into a coma again.” He stroked his neck with his finger and mimicked making an incision, “Tracheal intubation, have you heard of it? It requires general anesthesia.”
Xu RenDong saw him making gestures on his neck and was immediately reminded of his bad memories. His back was suddenly cold and he always felt that someone would stretch out their hands from behind, drag him into the darkness and then slit his throat.
He couldn’t help but glance backwards. He happened to see Lian Qiao sleeping peacefully in the bed from the crack of the opened door. For some reason, his heart suddenly calmed down. If felt as if, as long as Lian Qiao was behind him, then he didn’t need to be scared.
Xu RenDong asked, “What illness do you have?”
“Multiple organ failure.” Yuan XueMing smiled. When his cigarette burned out, he took another cigarette from the cigarette case and lit it. Under the faint moonlight, Xu RenDong could see that the cigarette was some kind of expensive brand. Yuan XueMing continued, “Actually, I should have died a long time ago but my family couldn’t let me go so I was pushed into the ICU. My heart, lungs, and kidneys are all no longer good. Every day I have red blood cells, platelets and albumin infusions, relying on these things to hang onto my life. Don’t even mention it, I’m at the best hospital in the country, the best ICU, the technology is really good. Even my body, which is rotten from the inside out, has dragged on for several months. It’s great to be rich.”
Xu RenDong suddenly didn’t know what to say.
“Guess what I was thinking about when I saw the elevator for the first time?” Yuan XueMing’s tone was calm and even a little humorous. “I thought: The Underworld is really advancing with the times now and even sent an elevator to pick people up to go to hell. … I never expected that the elevator did send me to hell but it’s not the kind of hell I imagined.”
Xu RenDong asked, “When was the first time you entered the elevator?”
Yuan XueMing turned his head and glanced at him, revealing a gentle but helpless smile: “Young man, did you know that there are two types of general anesthesia; deep anesthesia and light anesthesia? Deep anesthesia is complete anesthesia, just like going to sleep completely, people are totally unaware of their surroundings. And light anesthesia just allows you to not feel pain. Your body can’t move but your consciousness is still clear.”
Xu RenDong was taken aback. This didn’t answer his question but the implications made him feel terrified.
Yuan XueMing looked at the snowfield outside the window and slowly said: “Every morning, you can hear the doctors and nurses doing their hand-over and hear them walk around. The interns will practice on you. Although the needle sticks don’t hurt, you can hear them discuss how come they can’t find the blood vessels yet, whether they should change direction or not. There’s always people needing to get rescued in the middle of the night. You can hear the doctor on duty doing CPR, all of them panting and tired to death. Whether or not that patient has been successfully rescued or has been relieved from this world, you will have to wait for the next day to find out. Although the person with light anesthesia is conscious, it is still anesthesia after all. You will feel dizzy and the soul seems like it’s floating outside the body. It is connected to the instrument by the infusion tubes. You just wait and wait in a daze, you can hear everything, know everything, just like you are having a lucid dream. You can’t feel the presence of your body… but you are awake.” He paused, his smile finally revealed a little sadness, “Think about it, in this state, how could I remember the first time I got into the elevator? When was it?”
Xu RenDong was silent. Yuan XueMing smiled and said, “So in fact, I am still a little grateful for this ghost world. Although it is easy to die here, only here can I feel that I am a person again and that I am still alive.”
His cigarette ran out again. So he took out the third cigarette. Xu RenDong forgot that there was still a cigarette in his hand and at this time the cigarette butt almost burned to his fingers. He simply pinched the cigarette and felt a little complicated for a moment. He lowered his eyes and said, “Take that doll with you and don’t give it to others.”
Yuan XueMing said, “I know, this doll will save my life.”
Xu RenDong was surprised. Yuan XueMing explained: “If you play a lot, you will have a general understanding of the routines here. Like this kind of key prop, it will either kill you or save you. Since the two who died yesterday didn’t have a doll on them, then it proves that the doll can be used to save lives.”
Xu RenDong suddenly felt cold. He remembered that in the last reincarnation, Jiang Li accused Yuan XueMing of using a newcomer to test the conditions of death. At that time, he thought it was Jiang Li who was out of control and overly suspicious but now it seems that Yuan XueMing clearly had such thoughts.
Xu RenDong’s voice couldn’t help but also became cold: “Then why didn’t you tell everyone?”
Yuan XueMing smiled and shook his head: “You are still inexperienced. What’s the use of telling them? There are only three dolls in total but our team has a total of more than a dozen people. Speak out so everyone will fight each other and shed blood? Everyone wants to save their own life. My life is close to an end. Some people here are young and vigorous, with a lot of life to live. Others, like Xu Hong, can’t die even though she tries so hard. Things are just so strange and fickle. Who can make sense of it?” {He’s pointing out that Xu Hong often does things which make people feel like she should be the first one to die; get angry, go off on her own etc etc, not that she actually wants to die or anything.}
Xu RenDong’s face was cold and he didn’t say a thing. This didn’t anger Yuan XueMing. Instead, he patted him on the shoulder and said in an elder’s cordial tone: “You are still young, maybe you can’t accept this but these are the facts. This is destiny.”
Xu RenDong couldn’t help thinking: Then why is my destiny to die repeatedly? Why me, why only me?
What did I do wrong to have to go through all this pain?
Yuan XueMing saw that his face was very bad and comforted him: “Don’t worry. We are also destined. If I find a doll again, I will definitely give it to you.”
Xu RenDong resisted and said coldly: “No need.”
Yuan XueMing smiled. “So you and your little friend already have a matryoshka?”
Xu RenDong was shocked. He immediately realized that he was being tricked into revealing something and his expression couldn’t help but change. Yuan XueMing saw his reaction, laughed and said: “… Didn’t I say it? You still lack experience. It’s okay not to want to harm anyone else but you can’t not be on the defence. You should be more careful from now on.”
After he said that, he paced away leisurely and left Xu RenDong alone in the corridor in a complicated mood.
Is Yuan XueMing an enemy or a friend? He still couldn’t tell.
Are these old-timers who have experienced the world of ghosts so unfathomable? Jiang Li, Wang Yuan, Yuan XueMing… all of them are very contemplative, plotting every step. If it were not for the ability to reset the world, Xu RenDong would probably die without knowing how he died.
—So how about Lian Qiao?
Xu RenDong felt his heart constrict and his chest felt uncomfortable. He opened the door and returned to the bed and saw Lian Qiao was still asleep. Lian Qiao slept like an unsuspecting baby, even smacking his lips, like there was a sweet aftertaste in his mouth. There was also a smile at the corner of his lips.
Suddenly, Xu RenDong had a very familiar feeling, which made him feel more relieved. There wasn’t any reason to think Lian Qiao wasn’t trustworthy.
Lian Qiao was the only one who he could trust.
For the first time in his life, Xu RenDong decided to abandon his reason and trust his instincts.
The next day, Xu RenDong slept in on a rare occasion. He was awakened by Lian Qiao. Lian Qiao told him anxiously that it was noisy outside and that something might have happened again. “Let’s go out and have a look.”
Xu RenDong had anticipated this. He stood up and said: “Okay.”
Sure enough, everyone in the hallway was gathered in front of the door to a certain room. They were whispering to each other and their expressions were not very good. Yuan XueMing was among them and he smiled at Xu RenDong. Xu RenDong looked away in silence.
It was the two girls who died this time, the two who stared at Xu RenDong last night but never dared to talk to him. Xu RenDong naturally didn’t understand the thoughts of these girls. He only felt that now that they were dead, it was really pitiful to be stared at and commented on by everyone.
The laughter last night was like an anesthetic and everyone deliberately forgot that they were still in danger. But now, death has come again to shatter everyone’s dreams. Uneasy emotions once again spread in everyone’s hearts.
Someone collapsed and yelled questioningly: “What are the conditions for ghosts to kill? If this continues, we will all be killed before we can gather all the dolls!”
Xu Hong sneered, staring at Yuan XueMing and said: “Who knows? Didn’t he say that the conditions in each world are different?”
Yuan XueMing ignored her provocation and said, “Let’s go to the east to search today. I still think that the most important thing is to finish the task as soon as possible and leave.”
Everyone had no objections so they packed their bags and prepared to go out and explore.
Xu RenDong and Lian Qiao also returned to their room. Lian Qiao silently stuffed the crowbar into the backpack and then showed a somewhat hesitant expression, looking at him eagerly.
Xu RenDong asked: “What’s the matter?”
Lian Qiao said, “Brother RenDong, the four people who died yesterday and today have one thing in common, that is they didn’t find a matryoshka. Do you think…”
Xu RenDong didn’t expect Lian Qiao to guess the conditions of death so quickly. He thought for a while and felt that there was no need to hide from Lian Qiao, so he nodded: “I also think that the death condition is probably this. Actually, I heard the conversation between the rabbit and the two girls last night.” He couldn’t tell Lian Qiao that he had experienced death several times so he could only lie. “I heard the rabbit ask them if they had found a matryoshka.”
Lian Qiao’s expression changed: “Then they just…?”
Xu RenDong said, “Yeah. “
Lian Qiao frowned, his expression getting more and more solemn. Xu RenDong thought he was scared so he soothed: “Don’t worry, I actually found a matryoshka long ago and put one on you. The two of us should be okay for now.”
Lian Qiao opened his eyes in surprise. He fumbled around on his body and really found a matryoshka. This was the one in the basement, it was only a little bigger than the smallest doll so Xu RenDong was able to hide on him without him knowing it.
Lian Qiao pinched the doll in his hand and poked it in the face with his fingers. He whispered: “Brother RenDong, when did you hide it? Why didn’t I know about it?”
Xu RenDong said, “While you were sleeping.”
Lian Qiao suddenly snorted and covered his face: “While the ignorant boy was asleep, the man beside him actually did that to him…”
Xu RenDong: “…” What the hell was this silly boy going on about?
Lian Qiao moved his finger slightly, and quietly glanced at him from the gap between his fingers: “Brother RenDong, you are so good to me. Do you by any chance have a longstanding secret crush on me?”
Xu RenDong thought seriously and said, “No.”
Lian Qiao: “Oh.” He put down his hands in disappointment.
Xu RenDong looked at him and suddenly remembered the night when they first met, Lian Qiao called it the “imprinting effect”. He was saved by him and he happened to be the first person he met in this world so Lian Qiao relied on him like a newborn baby bird and trusted him.
That happened a long time ago and this time Lian Qiao couldn’t remember it anymore. After the world was reset, Lian Qiao’s memory of him was also erased. Nothing was left.
But Xu RenDong still remembers.
So he looked into Lian Qiao’s eyes and said seriously: “I treat you well because you are the first little bird I have encountered in this world.”
Lian Qiao was taken aback for a moment and subconsciously looked down somewhere. He looked and then muttered: “I’m not that little.”
Xu RenDong: “…” Young man, why are your thoughts so dirty?
***
