[12th Round] Post-processing
► Confusion: You can tell by your bones?
“Naturally, Trainee Teacher!”
Just like me, the Righteous Hero, my son’s spine was straight, and because his vertebral joints were soft, his back was flexible.
But it would hurt for a while.
“Kha?!”
My son staggered and grabbed his back.
“You shouldn’t relax just because you’re young.”
“Oooh…”
“Although with the help of youth and magic, you will quickly recover. After all, I only touched you lightly.”
“Lightly… Kh!”
I looked at my son again. Family meetings were, of course, good, but we could no longer put off the work that I had to do as an emperor.
“My army, heed my call!”
The war wasn’t over yet.
“Pursue and hunt down the retreating fleet of the Northern Continent. Do as you will with the men, but take the women alive!”
Because Sage fell with a nosebleed, the sea began to melt. The mermaids, now freed, began to take their own captives.
“Whoa!”
“S-save me!”
“I’m still a virgin…”
“My clothes… What are you doing?!”
Splash! Splash!
They jumped out of the water like dolphins and grabbed soldiers who had lost their motivation to fight, taking them under the water.
Virgins, boys, old people, freaks…
There were no exceptions.
High-ranking mermaids took men with good looks and high skills. Those of lower rank got the rest.
Their fate was sealed.
Those female fishes wouldn’t kill them, but they would never let them go back to their families and friends until they had squeezed all the juices out of them. At that point, they’d simply throw them ashore.
And if they liked someone, they would leave him on a deserted island.
“Your Majesty, what are you going to do with the surviving women?” Asked the previous owner of this ship, Old Aristocrat A.
“If they’re wizards, then we’ll recruit them to our side. If not, send them to wash dishes and clean toilets.”
In this world, it was usually men who were involved in battles.
However, fragile women also sometimes took part in battles. If there were firearms in the modern world, then there was magic in the Fantasy World. With modern weapons in hand, a person just needed to pull the trigger. Likewise, to use magic, they didn’t need much power.
There were exceptions, of course.
“And what to do with them? Send them to your bedroom?” Old Aristocrat A pointed to the Hero’s companions.
Sage was dragged away with a nosebleed by the Mermaid Queen, and as soon as the other mermaids heard my order, they immediately captured the male companions.
The ones left were…
The Sword Princess, Ice Princess, Saintess C…
It was better not to mess with these dangerous women.
As soon as I let my guard down, deceived by their slender figures, I would immediately say goodbye to this world.
They had impressive stats.
Since skills and levels were calculated not by addition but by multiplication, muscular men were often stronger, but if such individuals could overpower them, they wouldn’t be here now.
“No exceptions… Hey! Leave the underage boy with a bad back, damn fish!”
I chased away the mermaids who were about to drag my son away.
That was really dangerous!
In a few years, I would’ve gained a hundred granddaughters.
If that happened, then my mother would definitely punish me with her tennis racket.
“Son? Ready to get things done?”
“My mom…”
Chris was worried about the Sword Princess being dragged away by the knights.
“She will be tortured.”
“H-how can you be so cruel?!”
“Until I unite the Northern Continent, we need to make her do the cleaning and dishwashing, which she hates, all day.”
“That’s torture…?”
The boy was confused.
I smiled and stroked his head.
Instead of shaking his head in different directions because he didn’t like it, he grabbed his back again and fell.
“Your father is a hero.”
“I’ve already heard that.”
“That’s why I’m fair.”
“Uhh… Huh?”
“I could’ve punished my enemies, including the ones dragged away by the mermaids, severely. There are many ways. I can have their arms and legs cut off and stop the bleeding. I can take their clothes off and put them on posts, displaying them like flags. I can also torment them physically, followed by healing, until their level drops to 1… What? Isn’t that what you expected?”
The boy’s face turned pale.
“Are you really a hero?”
“Yes. In fact, due to its shackles, I can’t do any of those. I’m just being used, and I hope you see that as well. Since I’m ahead of everyone else, you think I should endure everything and not harm others, don’t you? Am I wrong?”
“Well…”
“I’ll say it again. I’m not waging wars.”
War took everything from the defeated.
But even if I won, I wouldn’t get anything.
I already had women on standby, and once I cleaned out the angels’ treasury, I would never be short of funds.
And the post of the emperor was also insignificant for me.
“Then why?”
“To show you that your father is so great that I’m incomparable to any other father in the world.”
“…”
“You can ignore the Western Continent, where only huge flies live, as well as the depleted Southern Continent. That leaves only three continents. If you capture at least two of these three continents, then you can achieve what no emperor has ever been able to achieve.”
“That’s kind of… Awkward.”
“The first time is always awkward.”
I didn’t argue with the child and just admitted it.
What did it mean to be a “great father”?
As far as I remembered, my father was the honorary president of the tennis club. And he cooked well, unlike my mother, who only had to touch plates to break it.
But that was all.
I wanted my son to respect me. I had never respected my father, so he couldn’t be a good example in that regard.
Moreover, all these were memories of 60 years ago.
After being abducted into this world, my memory improved thanks to my skills, so if I forgot something, it was only because I didn’t care about it.
“Drug Hero, what’s my name?”
Then I developed a strange habit.
In the 1st round, all I thought about was how to get back to Earth. Therefore, I deliberately ignored any connections in this world.
I didn’t even bother remembering names.
After all, even if I learned them, they would be of no use to me once I returned to Earth.
These were just casual connections.
But I didn’t think I would have to live with that way of thinking for another 60 years.
I didn’t remember what was of no value to me. After all, those wouldn’t prevent the killing of the Demon Lord in any way.
“I can simply hand over the throne of the emperor to you, but if I do it thoughtlessly, the end of the Central Continent will come. If I, the person with the absolute right to suppress others, retire, people with a different ideology will immediately appear and become your enemies. That will lead to the suffering of the people. Plus, it’s the Holy Mollan Empire. This war was started in the name of Master Mollan. Retreating would be considered blasphemy. We must never stop until we conquer and unite the Northern Continent under my command.”
“You leave me no choice.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
I sincerely apologized.
I thought if my son found out that I had united the Central Continent, he would happily shout, “Cool!” But his reaction was far from my expectations.
It all went wrong from the start.
All this was the fault of the teaching faculty.
Because they messed with the Sword Princess’s dreams, our touching family reunion turned into such a mess.
Someday I will find out why everything has become like this!
“And my back?”
“Your punishment for punching your father.”
“When will it pass?”
“I can fix it, but if I were going to heal you right away, I wouldn’t have crippled you in the first place. From now on, every time your back hurts, remember to respect your parents. I can only advise a mucus massage. It will help elevate the aches you’re feeling.”
The Holy Mollan Empire navy had reached the Northern Continent.
Since most of their men were abducted by sea mermaids, their port was empty.
Only women and children remained in the port city.
The mayor and the feudal lords fled.
“Complete chaos.”
There was no one left to look after the order.
We saw how some hooligans grabbed the girls and sexually harassed them.
“Oh, you… Kh?!”
My son was about to pounce on them like an angry rhino, but, clutching his back, he stopped.
That was why I love herniated discs.
They soothed those who try to act rashly.
“From today onwards, I am now the new ruler of this land and the people that live in it! The laws to follow are simple. Those who take advantage of the riches of the greatest Master Mollan will be sentenced to death. Hang those hooligans at the square.”
“Your Majesty, many of our soldiers need to rest.” Said Aristocrat B, who was standing next to Old Aristocrat A.
“Make a list of the names of the dead, and take the wounded from the ship and heal them in empty residences. Give the soldiers who have made special contributions some pocket money and allow them to have fun.”
“Have fun? That means…”
“You perfectly understand what I mean, so why bother asking? Or do you want to hear it personally from me to be sure?”
“Ahem! Forgive this old man for his stupidity.”
Old Aristocrat A burst out laughing.
“War tires people, even if they’re not fighting. It’s all about the atmosphere. The soldiers must be tired of eating the same food every day as well, so make sure to add a few more
“Um… Your Majesty.”
“What now?”
“That’s not entirely true.”
“Hmm?”
I looked at Aristocrat B for an answer.
“Apparently, because the food was prepared by the three best beauties of the Northern Continent, the soldiers have no complaints, although the dishes aren’t the most exquisite. As you said, it’s all about the atmosphere. Haha!”
“Apparently so.”
There were three women in the Northern Continent of Fantasy whose beauty surpassed the rest. In my subjective opinion, everything about them except their personalities was beautiful.
Sword Princess, Saintess C, Ice Princess.
I wanted to get them to do all kinds of errands, starting with cleaning the entire ship, but it took them all day just to cook the food.
The Ice Princess and the Saintess, who didn’t know how to cook, just peeled potatoes and distributed food…
But the soldiers were happy all the same.
“It’s safe to say that there are no soldiers in the Holy Mollan Empire who cannot contain their desires. Not because of courage and willpower, but because they were too shocked when they saw mermaids in the afternoon.”
“That’s…”
The post-war process now was different from before!
“I instruct you to deal with the rest of the minor matters. From tomorrow, split up the fleet and capture every port in the southern part of the Northern Continent to ensure the safe delivery of goods.”
“What will you be doing, Your Majesty?”
“My son and I will go inland.”
After the meeting ended, only I, the First Spirit, and Ssosia remained in the office. Chris went out to check the Sword Princess’s safety.
Ssosia sat on a huge sofa with her legs crossed.
“Cowardly Hero, I thought you were a scoundrel, but now I see you in a different light. You’re surprisingly gentle toward your family.”
“I’m not soft, but I just don’t know how to behave.”
I sat down next to her and leaned against the wide back of the sofa.
“Are you tired?”
“No…”
I started all this to look good in my son’s eyes, but now I regretted becoming an emperor.
What happened to the being who conquered the entire galaxy?
“If you’re curious, how about asking him personally?”
“What?
“I thought you knew. He watches you all the time. If you call him now, he will appear.”
“Really now?”
I smiled in disbelief, but…
▷ Confirmation: Everything is as Ssosia said. Have you decided to sympathize with me? You not knowing what to do with your son is… so humanly. It’s far from your usual personality that breaks the backs and necks of beauties without second thoughts.
It wasn’t Trainee Teacher. Their mode of communication was similar, but the communicator was a completely different person.
How could he watch me?
▷ Explanation: What a stupid question. All of the companions I have traveled with have become honored teachers. Did you think I was an exception?
The First Hero answered me cheerfully.
[12th Round] Post-processing
► Confusion: You can tell by your bones?
“Naturally, Trainee Teacher!”
Just like me, the Righteous Hero, my son’s spine was straight, and because his vertebral joints were soft, his back was flexible.
But it would hurt for a while.
“Kha?!”
My son staggered and grabbed his back.
“You shouldn’t relax just because you’re young.”
“Oooh…”
“Although with the help of youth and magic, you will quickly recover. After all, I only touched you lightly.”
“Lightly… Kh!”
I looked at my son again. Family meetings were, of course, good, but we could no longer put off the work that I had to do as an emperor.
“My army, heed my call!”
The war wasn’t over yet.
“Pursue and hunt down the retreating fleet of the Northern Continent. Do as you will with the men, but take the women alive!”
Because Sage fell with a nosebleed, the sea began to melt. The mermaids, now freed, began to take their own captives.
“Whoa!”
“S-save me!”
“I’m still a virgin…”
“My clothes… What are you doing?!”
Splash! Splash!
They jumped out of the water like dolphins and grabbed soldiers who had lost their motivation to fight, taking them under the water.
Virgins, boys, old people, freaks…
There were no exceptions.
High-ranking mermaids took men with good looks and high skills. Those of lower rank got the rest.
Their fate was sealed.
Those female fishes wouldn’t kill them, but they would never let them go back to their families and friends until they had squeezed all the juices out of them. At that point, they’d simply throw them ashore.
And if they liked someone, they would leave him on a deserted island.
“Your Majesty, what are you going to do with the surviving women?” Asked the previous owner of this ship, Old Aristocrat A.
“If they’re wizards, then we’ll recruit them to our side. If not, send them to wash dishes and clean toilets.”
In this world, it was usually men who were involved in battles.
However, fragile women also sometimes took part in battles. If there were firearms in the modern world, then there was magic in the Fantasy World. With modern weapons in hand, a person just needed to pull the trigger. Likewise, to use magic, they didn’t need much power.
There were exceptions, of course.
“And what to do with them? Send them to your bedroom?” Old Aristocrat A pointed to the Hero’s companions.
Sage was dragged away with a nosebleed by the Mermaid Queen, and as soon as the other mermaids heard my order, they immediately captured the male companions.
The ones left were…
The Sword Princess, Ice Princess, Saintess C…
It was better not to mess with these dangerous women.
As soon as I let my guard down, deceived by their slender figures, I would immediately say goodbye to this world.
They had impressive stats.
Since skills and levels were calculated not by addition but by multiplication, muscular men were often stronger, but if such individuals could overpower them, they wouldn’t be here now.
“No exceptions… Hey! Leave the underage boy with a bad back, damn fish!”
I chased away the mermaids who were about to drag my son away.
That was really dangerous!
In a few years, I would’ve gained a hundred granddaughters.
If that happened, then my mother would definitely punish me with her tennis racket.
“Son? Ready to get things done?”
“My mom…”
Chris was worried about the Sword Princess being dragged away by the knights.
“She will be tortured.”
“H-how can you be so cruel?!”
“Until I unite the Northern Continent, we need to make her do the cleaning and dishwashing, which she hates, all day.”
“That’s torture…?”
The boy was confused.
I smiled and stroked his head.
Instead of shaking his head in different directions because he didn’t like it, he grabbed his back again and fell.
“Your father is a hero.”
“I’ve already heard that.”
“That’s why I’m fair.”
“Uhh… Huh?”
“I could’ve punished my enemies, including the ones dragged away by the mermaids, severely. There are many ways. I can have their arms and legs cut off and stop the bleeding. I can take their clothes off and put them on posts, displaying them like flags. I can also torment them physically, followed by healing, until their level drops to 1… What? Isn’t that what you expected?”
The boy’s face turned pale.
“Are you really a hero?”
“Yes. In fact, due to its shackles, I can’t do any of those. I’m just being used, and I hope you see that as well. Since I’m ahead of everyone else, you think I should endure everything and not harm others, don’t you? Am I wrong?”
“Well…”
“I’ll say it again. I’m not waging wars.”
War took everything from the defeated.
But even if I won, I wouldn’t get anything.
I already had women on standby, and once I cleaned out the angels’ treasury, I would never be short of funds.
And the post of the emperor was also insignificant for me.
“Then why?”
“To show you that your father is so great that I’m incomparable to any other father in the world.”
“…”
“You can ignore the Western Continent, where only huge flies live, as well as the depleted Southern Continent. That leaves only three continents. If you capture at least two of these three continents, then you can achieve what no emperor has ever been able to achieve.”
“That’s kind of… Awkward.”
“The first time is always awkward.”
I didn’t argue with the child and just admitted it.
What did it mean to be a “great father”?
As far as I remembered, my father was the honorary president of the tennis club. And he cooked well, unlike my mother, who only had to touch plates to break it.
But that was all.
I wanted my son to respect me. I had never respected my father, so he couldn’t be a good example in that regard.
Moreover, all these were memories of 60 years ago.
After being abducted into this world, my memory improved thanks to my skills, so if I forgot something, it was only because I didn’t care about it.
“Drug Hero, what’s my name?”
Then I developed a strange habit.
In the 1st round, all I thought about was how to get back to Earth. Therefore, I deliberately ignored any connections in this world.
I didn’t even bother remembering names.
After all, even if I learned them, they would be of no use to me once I returned to Earth.
These were just casual connections.
But I didn’t think I would have to live with that way of thinking for another 60 years.
I didn’t remember what was of no value to me. After all, those wouldn’t prevent the killing of the Demon Lord in any way.
“I can simply hand over the throne of the emperor to you, but if I do it thoughtlessly, the end of the Central Continent will come. If I, the person with the absolute right to suppress others, retire, people with a different ideology will immediately appear and become your enemies. That will lead to the suffering of the people. Plus, it’s the Holy Mollan Empire. This war was started in the name of Master Mollan. Retreating would be considered blasphemy. We must never stop until we conquer and unite the Northern Continent under my command.”
“You leave me no choice.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
I sincerely apologized.
I thought if my son found out that I had united the Central Continent, he would happily shout, “Cool!” But his reaction was far from my expectations.
It all went wrong from the start.
All this was the fault of the teaching faculty.
Because they messed with the Sword Princess’s dreams, our touching family reunion turned into such a mess.
Someday I will find out why everything has become like this!
“And my back?”
“Your punishment for punching your father.”
“When will it pass?”
“I can fix it, but if I were going to heal you right away, I wouldn’t have crippled you in the first place. From now on, every time your back hurts, remember to respect your parents. I can only advise a mucus massage. It will help elevate the aches you’re feeling.”
The Holy Mollan Empire navy had reached the Northern Continent.
Since most of their men were abducted by sea mermaids, their port was empty.
Only women and children remained in the port city.
The mayor and the feudal lords fled.
“Complete chaos.”
There was no one left to look after the order.
We saw how some hooligans grabbed the girls and sexually harassed them.
“Oh, you… Kh?!”
My son was about to pounce on them like an angry rhino, but, clutching his back, he stopped.
That was why I love herniated discs.
They soothed those who try to act rashly.
“From today onwards, I am now the new ruler of this land and the people that live in it! The laws to follow are simple. Those who take advantage of the riches of the greatest Master Mollan will be sentenced to death. Hang those hooligans at the square.”
“Your Majesty, many of our soldiers need to rest.” Said Aristocrat B, who was standing next to Old Aristocrat A.
“Make a list of the names of the dead, and take the wounded from the ship and heal them in empty residences. Give the soldiers who have made special contributions some pocket money and allow them to have fun.”
“Have fun? That means…”
“You perfectly understand what I mean, so why bother asking? Or do you want to hear it personally from me to be sure?”
“Ahem! Forgive this old man for his stupidity.”
Old Aristocrat A burst out laughing.
“War tires people, even if they’re not fighting. It’s all about the atmosphere. The soldiers must be tired of eating the same food every day as well, so make sure to add a few more
“Um… Your Majesty.”
“What now?”
“That’s not entirely true.”
“Hmm?”
I looked at Aristocrat B for an answer.
“Apparently, because the food was prepared by the three best beauties of the Northern Continent, the soldiers have no complaints, although the dishes aren’t the most exquisite. As you said, it’s all about the atmosphere. Haha!”
“Apparently so.”
There were three women in the Northern Continent of Fantasy whose beauty surpassed the rest. In my subjective opinion, everything about them except their personalities was beautiful.
Sword Princess, Saintess C, Ice Princess.
I wanted to get them to do all kinds of errands, starting with cleaning the entire ship, but it took them all day just to cook the food.
The Ice Princess and the Saintess, who didn’t know how to cook, just peeled potatoes and distributed food…
But the soldiers were happy all the same.
“It’s safe to say that there are no soldiers in the Holy Mollan Empire who cannot contain their desires. Not because of courage and willpower, but because they were too shocked when they saw mermaids in the afternoon.”
“That’s…”
The post-war process now was different from before!
“I instruct you to deal with the rest of the minor matters. From tomorrow, split up the fleet and capture every port in the southern part of the Northern Continent to ensure the safe delivery of goods.”
“What will you be doing, Your Majesty?”
“My son and I will go inland.”
After the meeting ended, only I, the First Spirit, and Ssosia remained in the office. Chris went out to check the Sword Princess’s safety.
Ssosia sat on a huge sofa with her legs crossed.
“Cowardly Hero, I thought you were a scoundrel, but now I see you in a different light. You’re surprisingly gentle toward your family.”
“I’m not soft, but I just don’t know how to behave.”
I sat down next to her and leaned against the wide back of the sofa.
“Are you tired?”
“No…”
I started all this to look good in my son’s eyes, but now I regretted becoming an emperor.
What happened to the being who conquered the entire galaxy?
“If you’re curious, how about asking him personally?”
“What?
“I thought you knew. He watches you all the time. If you call him now, he will appear.”
“Really now?”
I smiled in disbelief, but…
▷ Confirmation: Everything is as Ssosia said. Have you decided to sympathize with me? You not knowing what to do with your son is… so humanly. It’s far from your usual personality that breaks the backs and necks of beauties without second thoughts.
It wasn’t Trainee Teacher. Their mode of communication was similar, but the communicator was a completely different person.
How could he watch me?
▷ Explanation: What a stupid question. All of the companions I have traveled with have become honored teachers. Did you think I was an exception?
The First Hero answered me cheerfully.
