Having the Same Name as the Demon Lord of the Abyss
extra
“My dear, look at me.”
A bored to death person, with a bored to death sound, drooping eyes, a deep voice, a coquettish tone that sounded like an order.
——I am looking.
Under the faint starlight in the dark night, looking at those clear and beautiful eyes, like the autumn water uncovered by the wind blowing through reeds on the river bank.
“I want to know, when you look at me, right now, what thoughts run through your heart?”
——When you look at the other person’s eyes, aren’t you able to see the true thoughts in their heart?
“En, but I can’t see anything, perhaps it is because your eyes are too beautiful.”
The irreverent and lowered eyes, because of the dark and decadent smile, suddenly brightened for a moment.
——It is what you see, I am thinking of nothing.
That bright and wanton smile was still there, grim and scornful in its depths, a depraved and dull countenance practicing the heterodox doctrines, but the temperature at the bottom of those eyes and the touch of those fingertips explored with infinite patience.
“Compared to the beginning, you seldom smile…are you in a bad mood?”
——People will slowly experience change with the passing of time, I am also being changed by time. Feeling bored and tired?
“What are you saying?” He suddenly smiled, raising his eyebrows lightly, holding back his laughter as if admonishing, yet also like he was acting coquettish. The expression in his eyes gradually returned to a serious and peaceful state.
Devoting his mind to him, not even sparing a second to blink.
“I won’t tire of you, I never will, but, I want you to be closer to me and depend on me a little.”
A deep voice, whispering softly, speaking with an amorous smile. There was light in those dangerous and cold eyes, an imperceptible, careful gentleness.
——I don’t know how else to be closer and dependent, I have already done so to the greatest extent. Would it be better if I hug you like this?
“Then you have to hug a little tighter ah, and say some sweet words spoken between lovers.” The man who complained coquettishly, tightened this embrace even more, and said with an arrogant tone, “And also, it can’t be too short, you must hug me until the moon rises from here, and falls over there ah.”
——Okay, I understand.
“What to do, I’m getting more and more unsatisfied. I thought this would be enough just a moment ago, but now I don’t feel like it’s enough.”
In the dream, the ice-cold, giant snake extended its tongue. The intimacy of an embrace and the prelude to a meal, the boundaries were blurred.
——If you can’t bear it, you can eat me.
The deep and wintry voice, “My dearest is always holding onto the idea that he will be eaten. Do you love me?”
——En.
“You say ‘en’, does ‘en’ mean that you really do love me?”
——En, I love.
“Say a few more words, a few more sentences.” Like a sigh, crestfallen and gloomy, downcast as if facing loneliness.
Was he being too cold?
——There is an attraction between you and me that I don’t even understand myself. From the moment I first saw you, it flourished along with fear, together. Always, always like this, like the line between life and death in the amusement park.
“I’m so happy oh, but even this is not enough, still not enough, what should I do? I’m feeling even more hungry.” A lazy smile, a deep voice, an unknown temptation or a harbinger of danger.
——If you only eat a little, as long as I don’t die, it’s okay. If one day, you tire of me, you can completely eat me, that will also be okay.
An undisciplined tone, sombre and discourteous, “But, if I am tired, I won’t feel hungry anymore.”
——That is true. By that time, will I be the only one left?
Just at the thought of this, he suddenly felt a little lonely, as if even the value in his existence being killed off was gone.
Beside his ear, a deep laughter that couldn’t be held back, seductively blindfolding his eyes, sinking with him into the eternal night. “But, there won’t be such a day.”
A cool and soft kiss fell on his lips.
……
Regarding this point, this human named Ye Zun couldn’t fully believe it.
When he was a human baby, he never learned the faith in being loved.
Always living soberly and rationally, so as to resist the sting of external harm to a sensitive soul.
With the calm he deliberately maintained against his fear in the Demon God’s Amusement Park, he became more cold and rational, and even more helpless to his self-deception, even when facing the priest, the person he yearned for; a person who may not exist at all.
“Why? Do you think it’s not enough, meaning, I can love you even more?” He didn’t seem angry about his love being questioned. Instead of this kind of emotion that normal people would have, for some reason, the man suddenly grew more excited.
——Okay ah. A little bit more, even if it suffocates me, it’s okay.
Wanting to be loved like this, wanting to feel like he is being drowned in this love.
But he was afraid that overdrawing too much love will exhaust this person’s interest in him too early.
Often, with the distance between people, they get too close and want more, and instead, they end up unable to control each other’s disappointment and alienation. That situation will drive people to the deepest despair.
That man named Ye Lin, was not a patient person.
En, he wasn’t a ‘person’ either.
“What are you thinking about?” The man’s perverse and dangerous appearance frowned, a little cute with his coquettish behaviour. “Is ‘like’ something that can be overdrawn? I will only like you more and more ah.”
The bump on his throat rolled slightly.
Ye Zun looked at his eyes, their faces close to each other.
——Can I kiss you?
“En?” Surprised by what he heard, he opened his eyes slightly and looked at him with a smile as if flattered, and with careful, tender indulgence, he softly said, “Of course.”
This man shouldn’t have such emotions.
Caressing the man’s handsome eyes, on the lips that were perfect and innocent as a rose, but were in fact of pure abstinence, he lowered his own lips with restraint, and there was a light touch.
The moonlight hung down, sipping the white dew falling from the reeds above the wilderness.
The lips of the Abyss were cold, soft yet numbing, like kissing the reflection of autumn water.
The other person didn’t move, quietly and passively waiting for him to take the initiative to kiss.
With a light touch, he counted down from ten in his heart. When the time was up, he controlled himself to pull away.
“That’s all?” A deep sigh, like a sigh of dissatisfaction. “To kiss, you must kiss like this ah.”
The back of his neck was gently pressed by fingers, lightly applying pressure downwards, a request wholly sincere from top to bottom.
Opening lips as much as possible, as if unable to breath, stuck in suffocation and faint spells. But, it seemed as if they really did touch each other’s souls.
For a long, long time.
“I have always felt that you don’t love me. I think that, because you are too afraid of me, you had no choice but to hypnotise yourself, deceive yourself, the sickness that humans call Stockholm Syndrome. But I don’t mind. As long as you are by my side, it is all I need. I will always and forever wait for you.”
——It is not a sickness, it is love.
“Only when you take the initiative to kiss me can I be sure that, in that moment, you love me. In the future, you also need to take the initiative like this. Can you do it?”
——Probably not.
“…why ah?” An innocent tone.
From the beginning to the end, a man who has never given people the feeling that they are out of danger, in fact, has never actually shown a trace of aggression in front of him.
He was honest.
——You are too good-looking, the thought of kissing you comes easily.
As long as the vigilance towards danger was slightly blurred, the idea of intimacy will emerge, as if being bewitched. If it was possible, he didn’t just want to kiss. Like a hunger and thirst for skin, the uncontrollable clinginess was unavoidable.
——If left alone with no care, I will become very strange.
“You can be strange. Just leave it be ba, I am yours, you don’t need to ask to kiss.” The man’s eyes that held back a smile were clear and black, shining brilliantly.
So very beautiful. He was afraid, yet he couldn’t help but be tempted.
But he…couldn’t do it.
Thus far, he didn’t know what was so valuable about himself that he could be loved by this person, so much so that he was not even sure if the other person’s interest in him was love.
He was unable to control himself from being changed by the Demon God’s Amusement Park, and he has been deviating from the original Ye Zun all this time. If he let himself act on his inner thoughts, he will become even more unfamiliar*.
[T/N: 陌生, unfamiliar/strange]
Yes, deviate from the personality of Ye Zun, the Ye Zun that this person was interested in.
He wanted to maintain a personality that would keep this person interested for a little longer, putting all his effort in restraining the uncontrollable changes of time.
These were his true thoughts——if one day, the priest no longer regards him as special, it will be okay if he is eaten.
【 I hope this person is not real, that he is my hallucination, so that I can love him for a long, long time, forever and ever, and never worry that he will leave me. 】
【 Although the world is scary, and the giant snake in my dream is also scary, but for this reason, there is no need for me to be afraid. 】
——I love you.
“This time, is it not an exorcism spell?”
——No, I just love you.
It seems that I, too, was devoured.
“No at all. It is just because, the Abyss loves you too.”
【 The Abyss lured the real angel to love him using the reflection of Heaven, but was it him who the angel loves, or the priest in the Abyss’ reflection? 】
【 My dear, are you in love with someone who does not exist? So pitiful, but it is okay, don’t worry, I…will always keep that person alive. 】
【 He wants to satisfy him, yet also wants to take advantage* of him. He wants to protect him, yet he also wants to see the gaze that turns to him as he is in the danger of sinking into the swamp. 】
[T/N: 欺负: bully]
【 He likes watching him break out of the siege, alone and helpless, yet he also likes him leaning against himself, worn out and peacefully asleep. 】
【 He likes it when he is hidden by the night, belonging only to himself, yet he also likes it when he planted sunflowers on the side of the road, to illuminate the darkness. 】
“My dear, I love you.”
……
【 404 Train has arrived. Dear passengers, please disembark. 】
A little Ye Zun stood on the platform, the cold wind biting his bones. The freezing cold turned his mind into a haze. He vaguely recalled that his parents didn’t want him anymore, so they made him wait there for his grandma to pick him up.
But he also vaguely remembered that it happened a long, long time ago. He seemed to have already grown up, and grandma had also gotten too old and left him behind.
So, no one will come to pick him up this time ba.
He thought to himself quietly. He was not scared, and he felt no fear.
On a snowy and moonlit night, a person with their back to the light walked over from a distance.
The tall figure was projected on the ground by the moonlight. The dark shadow was like a fearsome giant snake.
He blinked, watching. That person walked until they were in front of him, bending their knees until half-crouching, and stroked his face. The temperature of the palm was as warm as the smile in those eyes.
“Father, did you come to pick me up?”
“En.” The priest with clear eyes that were gentle and restrained, carefully wrapped a scarf around him, smiling at him, who had an expressionless face. “I am here to bring Ye Zun home. After such a long journey, you must really want to go home. Come up ba.”
He lay on the priest’s back, hugging the man’s neck. The lights of the street lamps extinguished one by one, until only the moonlight fell on the snow.
Dead branches with teeth and claws stood alongside the road in the dark, like ghosts hiding one by one, whispering and murmuring, harbouring evil intentions.
But he was not afraid. It was like being carried on someone’s back for the first time, feeling at ease for the first time.
“Sleep if you are tired ba. When you open your eyes, you will be home.”
“Father, will you be there too?”
“Of course. You invited me, I will always and forever be with you.”
We will live together ah, that’s wonderful.
He closed his eyes, not caring for what awaits him, believing that when he opens his eyes again, he will definitely see the other person.
This person will not abandon him, he will always be with him.
Even so, he still lightly seized hold of a button on the man’s clothes, not letting go, wanting to grab onto something, so that he can remember.
……
For the person who walks with the Abyss, the Abyss peers into his heart, to perfect the disguise, and get closer and closer to the human.
And the one who was fearful at the beginning, who escaped at every turn, deceiving himself, with a smile like the wind on a late summer morning, the unripe and soft young man, between the nightmares and the awakenings on the endless journey, will become more cold and calm; a young man who will grow more and more indifferent.
Perhaps one day, the young man will no longer care about whether the Abyss loves him, he will no longer care about loneliness, and he will no longer fear or love. He will no longer be attached to the reflection of the priest, whether it be his existence or disappearance.
When that day comes, will the Abyss be afraid?
……
《 Part One · The Nightmare Border Chapter · End 》
Having the Same Name as the Demon Lord of the Abyss
extra
“My dear, look at me.”
A bored to death person, with a bored to death sound, drooping eyes, a deep voice, a coquettish tone that sounded like an order.
——I am looking.
Under the faint starlight in the dark night, looking at those clear and beautiful eyes, like the autumn water uncovered by the wind blowing through reeds on the river bank.
“I want to know, when you look at me, right now, what thoughts run through your heart?”
——When you look at the other person’s eyes, aren’t you able to see the true thoughts in their heart?
“En, but I can’t see anything, perhaps it is because your eyes are too beautiful.”
The irreverent and lowered eyes, because of the dark and decadent smile, suddenly brightened for a moment.
——It is what you see, I am thinking of nothing.
That bright and wanton smile was still there, grim and scornful in its depths, a depraved and dull countenance practicing the heterodox doctrines, but the temperature at the bottom of those eyes and the touch of those fingertips explored with infinite patience.
“Compared to the beginning, you seldom smile…are you in a bad mood?”
——People will slowly experience change with the passing of time, I am also being changed by time. Feeling bored and tired?
“What are you saying?” He suddenly smiled, raising his eyebrows lightly, holding back his laughter as if admonishing, yet also like he was acting coquettish. The expression in his eyes gradually returned to a serious and peaceful state.
Devoting his mind to him, not even sparing a second to blink.
“I won’t tire of you, I never will, but, I want you to be closer to me and depend on me a little.”
A deep voice, whispering softly, speaking with an amorous smile. There was light in those dangerous and cold eyes, an imperceptible, careful gentleness.
——I don’t know how else to be closer and dependent, I have already done so to the greatest extent. Would it be better if I hug you like this?
“Then you have to hug a little tighter ah, and say some sweet words spoken between lovers.” The man who complained coquettishly, tightened this embrace even more, and said with an arrogant tone, “And also, it can’t be too short, you must hug me until the moon rises from here, and falls over there ah.”
——Okay, I understand.
“What to do, I’m getting more and more unsatisfied. I thought this would be enough just a moment ago, but now I don’t feel like it’s enough.”
In the dream, the ice-cold, giant snake extended its tongue. The intimacy of an embrace and the prelude to a meal, the boundaries were blurred.
——If you can’t bear it, you can eat me.
The deep and wintry voice, “My dearest is always holding onto the idea that he will be eaten. Do you love me?”
——En.
“You say ‘en’, does ‘en’ mean that you really do love me?”
——En, I love.
“Say a few more words, a few more sentences.” Like a sigh, crestfallen and gloomy, downcast as if facing loneliness.
Was he being too cold?
——There is an attraction between you and me that I don’t even understand myself. From the moment I first saw you, it flourished along with fear, together. Always, always like this, like the line between life and death in the amusement park.
“I’m so happy oh, but even this is not enough, still not enough, what should I do? I’m feeling even more hungry.” A lazy smile, a deep voice, an unknown temptation or a harbinger of danger.
——If you only eat a little, as long as I don’t die, it’s okay. If one day, you tire of me, you can completely eat me, that will also be okay.
An undisciplined tone, sombre and discourteous, “But, if I am tired, I won’t feel hungry anymore.”
——That is true. By that time, will I be the only one left?
Just at the thought of this, he suddenly felt a little lonely, as if even the value in his existence being killed off was gone.
Beside his ear, a deep laughter that couldn’t be held back, seductively blindfolding his eyes, sinking with him into the eternal night. “But, there won’t be such a day.”
A cool and soft kiss fell on his lips.
……
Regarding this point, this human named Ye Zun couldn’t fully believe it.
When he was a human baby, he never learned the faith in being loved.
Always living soberly and rationally, so as to resist the sting of external harm to a sensitive soul.
With the calm he deliberately maintained against his fear in the Demon God’s Amusement Park, he became more cold and rational, and even more helpless to his self-deception, even when facing the priest, the person he yearned for; a person who may not exist at all.
“Why? Do you think it’s not enough, meaning, I can love you even more?” He didn’t seem angry about his love being questioned. Instead of this kind of emotion that normal people would have, for some reason, the man suddenly grew more excited.
——Okay ah. A little bit more, even if it suffocates me, it’s okay.
Wanting to be loved like this, wanting to feel like he is being drowned in this love.
But he was afraid that overdrawing too much love will exhaust this person’s interest in him too early.
Often, with the distance between people, they get too close and want more, and instead, they end up unable to control each other’s disappointment and alienation. That situation will drive people to the deepest despair.
That man named Ye Lin, was not a patient person.
En, he wasn’t a ‘person’ either.
“What are you thinking about?” The man’s perverse and dangerous appearance frowned, a little cute with his coquettish behaviour. “Is ‘like’ something that can be overdrawn? I will only like you more and more ah.”
The bump on his throat rolled slightly.
Ye Zun looked at his eyes, their faces close to each other.
——Can I kiss you?
“En?” Surprised by what he heard, he opened his eyes slightly and looked at him with a smile as if flattered, and with careful, tender indulgence, he softly said, “Of course.”
This man shouldn’t have such emotions.
Caressing the man’s handsome eyes, on the lips that were perfect and innocent as a rose, but were in fact of pure abstinence, he lowered his own lips with restraint, and there was a light touch.
The moonlight hung down, sipping the white dew falling from the reeds above the wilderness.
The lips of the Abyss were cold, soft yet numbing, like kissing the reflection of autumn water.
The other person didn’t move, quietly and passively waiting for him to take the initiative to kiss.
With a light touch, he counted down from ten in his heart. When the time was up, he controlled himself to pull away.
“That’s all?” A deep sigh, like a sigh of dissatisfaction. “To kiss, you must kiss like this ah.”
The back of his neck was gently pressed by fingers, lightly applying pressure downwards, a request wholly sincere from top to bottom.
Opening lips as much as possible, as if unable to breath, stuck in suffocation and faint spells. But, it seemed as if they really did touch each other’s souls.
For a long, long time.
“I have always felt that you don’t love me. I think that, because you are too afraid of me, you had no choice but to hypnotise yourself, deceive yourself, the sickness that humans call Stockholm Syndrome. But I don’t mind. As long as you are by my side, it is all I need. I will always and forever wait for you.”
——It is not a sickness, it is love.
“Only when you take the initiative to kiss me can I be sure that, in that moment, you love me. In the future, you also need to take the initiative like this. Can you do it?”
——Probably not.
“…why ah?” An innocent tone.
From the beginning to the end, a man who has never given people the feeling that they are out of danger, in fact, has never actually shown a trace of aggression in front of him.
He was honest.
——You are too good-looking, the thought of kissing you comes easily.
As long as the vigilance towards danger was slightly blurred, the idea of intimacy will emerge, as if being bewitched. If it was possible, he didn’t just want to kiss. Like a hunger and thirst for skin, the uncontrollable clinginess was unavoidable.
——If left alone with no care, I will become very strange.
“You can be strange. Just leave it be ba, I am yours, you don’t need to ask to kiss.” The man’s eyes that held back a smile were clear and black, shining brilliantly.
So very beautiful. He was afraid, yet he couldn’t help but be tempted.
But he…couldn’t do it.
Thus far, he didn’t know what was so valuable about himself that he could be loved by this person, so much so that he was not even sure if the other person’s interest in him was love.
He was unable to control himself from being changed by the Demon God’s Amusement Park, and he has been deviating from the original Ye Zun all this time. If he let himself act on his inner thoughts, he will become even more unfamiliar*.
[T/N: 陌生, unfamiliar/strange]
Yes, deviate from the personality of Ye Zun, the Ye Zun that this person was interested in.
He wanted to maintain a personality that would keep this person interested for a little longer, putting all his effort in restraining the uncontrollable changes of time.
These were his true thoughts——if one day, the priest no longer regards him as special, it will be okay if he is eaten.
【 I hope this person is not real, that he is my hallucination, so that I can love him for a long, long time, forever and ever, and never worry that he will leave me. 】
【 Although the world is scary, and the giant snake in my dream is also scary, but for this reason, there is no need for me to be afraid. 】
——I love you.
“This time, is it not an exorcism spell?”
——No, I just love you.
It seems that I, too, was devoured.
“No at all. It is just because, the Abyss loves you too.”
【 The Abyss lured the real angel to love him using the reflection of Heaven, but was it him who the angel loves, or the priest in the Abyss’ reflection? 】
【 My dear, are you in love with someone who does not exist? So pitiful, but it is okay, don’t worry, I…will always keep that person alive. 】
【 He wants to satisfy him, yet also wants to take advantage* of him. He wants to protect him, yet he also wants to see the gaze that turns to him as he is in the danger of sinking into the swamp. 】
[T/N: 欺负: bully]
【 He likes watching him break out of the siege, alone and helpless, yet he also likes him leaning against himself, worn out and peacefully asleep. 】
【 He likes it when he is hidden by the night, belonging only to himself, yet he also likes it when he planted sunflowers on the side of the road, to illuminate the darkness. 】
“My dear, I love you.”
……
【 404 Train has arrived. Dear passengers, please disembark. 】
A little Ye Zun stood on the platform, the cold wind biting his bones. The freezing cold turned his mind into a haze. He vaguely recalled that his parents didn’t want him anymore, so they made him wait there for his grandma to pick him up.
But he also vaguely remembered that it happened a long, long time ago. He seemed to have already grown up, and grandma had also gotten too old and left him behind.
So, no one will come to pick him up this time ba.
He thought to himself quietly. He was not scared, and he felt no fear.
On a snowy and moonlit night, a person with their back to the light walked over from a distance.
The tall figure was projected on the ground by the moonlight. The dark shadow was like a fearsome giant snake.
He blinked, watching. That person walked until they were in front of him, bending their knees until half-crouching, and stroked his face. The temperature of the palm was as warm as the smile in those eyes.
“Father, did you come to pick me up?”
“En.” The priest with clear eyes that were gentle and restrained, carefully wrapped a scarf around him, smiling at him, who had an expressionless face. “I am here to bring Ye Zun home. After such a long journey, you must really want to go home. Come up ba.”
He lay on the priest’s back, hugging the man’s neck. The lights of the street lamps extinguished one by one, until only the moonlight fell on the snow.
Dead branches with teeth and claws stood alongside the road in the dark, like ghosts hiding one by one, whispering and murmuring, harbouring evil intentions.
But he was not afraid. It was like being carried on someone’s back for the first time, feeling at ease for the first time.
“Sleep if you are tired ba. When you open your eyes, you will be home.”
“Father, will you be there too?”
“Of course. You invited me, I will always and forever be with you.”
We will live together ah, that’s wonderful.
He closed his eyes, not caring for what awaits him, believing that when he opens his eyes again, he will definitely see the other person.
This person will not abandon him, he will always be with him.
Even so, he still lightly seized hold of a button on the man’s clothes, not letting go, wanting to grab onto something, so that he can remember.
……
For the person who walks with the Abyss, the Abyss peers into his heart, to perfect the disguise, and get closer and closer to the human.
And the one who was fearful at the beginning, who escaped at every turn, deceiving himself, with a smile like the wind on a late summer morning, the unripe and soft young man, between the nightmares and the awakenings on the endless journey, will become more cold and calm; a young man who will grow more and more indifferent.
Perhaps one day, the young man will no longer care about whether the Abyss loves him, he will no longer care about loneliness, and he will no longer fear or love. He will no longer be attached to the reflection of the priest, whether it be his existence or disappearance.
When that day comes, will the Abyss be afraid?
……
《 Part One · The Nightmare Border Chapter · End 》
