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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 203

Published at 24th of January 2023 11:11:28 AM


Chapter 203

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“I said no!” Kondo shouted.

“Could it be…” Suddenly, Kawaki thought of a certain possibility. He instantly punched Kondo and scolded, “You bastard, do you think that your old mother from the countryside will embarrass you?! Is it great to be a civil servant?! Since you become a civil servant, you start disliking your mother?! You didn’t even think about who brought you into this world?”

Then, Kawaki looked at Bubbles again and sighed. He said, “It is better to cut ties with such an unfilial son as soon as possible.”

Kondo covered his swollen cheek and got up. After wiping his nosebleed, he argued loudly, “How many times do you want me to say it? That is not my mother!”

“Really?!” Kawaki had a look of disbelief on his face. Then, he sized up both Bubbles and Kondo once again, “But you really look like a real mother and son!”

“We don’t look at all good!” Kondo cursed. Then, he pointed at himself and said angrily, “Although I do look a bit like a gorilla, I am a real human!”

“Hey, what you said is too much.” Gintoki walked over and reminded Kawaki in a low voice, “No matter what, you can’t make fun of parents.”

“That right!” Kondo cupped his hands and nodded.

“It should be something like a younger brother, right?” Gintoki continued.

“NO! In the end, do you also think that I am a gorilla?!” Kondo immediately exploded, “This is just a pet, a pet!”

“Pet? Really?” Gintoki questioned, “You’re keeping one this big?”

“In the pet shop, she looked at me with a sad look, so…” Kondo rubbed the back of his head and forced a smile as he explained.

‘Princess, I am very sorry! However, for the sake of me being able to raise my head in front of this group of people in the future, I am sorry!’ Thinking of this, the corners of Kondo’s mouth slightly curved up. He actually felt a little lucky in his heart, ‘Great, it seems that the language barrier is also very beneficial.’

However, before Kondo could rejoice, he saw that Kawaki and Shinpachi had already started a fire. Gintoki and Kagura were sharpening their blades. The division of labor was very clear, and Bubbles had already been tied up.

“What do you want to do to the Princess?!” Kondo cursed.

“What are we going to do?” Kawaki looked at Kondo in surprise, “We are preparing for an outdoor barbecue? Can’t you tell? Also, what princess?”

‘I slipped up!’ Kondo’s face was covered in a cold sweat, but he still waved his hand and lied, “No, I mean, her name is Princess.”

“Is that so?” After saying that, Kawaki looked at Bubbles again, “But speaking of which, this gorilla is really big. Its meat must be very delicious. Alright! Today’s lunch is decided!”

“Enough!” As he shouted, Kondo stood in front of Bubbles and opened his hands, “Why do you do such a thing without the owner’s consent?! You guys are too self-willed!”

“Tsk, what a stingy guy.” Kawaki curled his lips in disdain.

“This has nothing to do with being stingy!” Kondo shouted and then turned to look at Bubbles behind him while thinking, ‘It’s so dangerous. With these people, Princess’ life is in danger at every moment! I have to think of a way to leave this place quickly!’

“Isn’t the so-called pet just a food reserve?” Kawaki pouted, “Isn’t this common sense? Aren’t you too stingy? You can’t even finish such a big thing on your own.”

“What kind of common sense is this?! There’s no such common sense at all!” Kondo retorted. However, just as he finished retorting, he saw Gintoki nodding and standing beside Kawaki, “Why do you agree with this common sense?”

“Gin-chan, are you raising Sadaharu as a food reserve-aru?!” Kagura kicked Gintoki away and cursed.

“Isn’t that common sense?” Gintoki covered his nose and slowly got up from the ground.

Hearing this, Kagura once again rushed toward Gintoki…

“Kawaki-san, I need to go to the toilet.” Shinpachi lowered his head and said.

It could be seen that Shinpachi was not in high spirits.

“Oh,” Kawaki answered, but then he thought of something. He then took out an envelope from his body and handed it to Shinpachi, “This is the reward.”

“But we basically didn’t do anything…” Shinpachi hurriedly declined.

“No, You’ve already helped a lot.” Kawaki smiled and said, “Moreover, I don’t want to become the kind of adult who doesn’t keep his word.”

Looking at the envelope in his hand, Shinpachi could not help but feel touched. He bowed to Kawaki and said, “Then thank you.”

After saying that, Shinpachi walked to the other side.

“What a good child…” Kawaki murmured as he looked at Shinpachi’s back.

Taking advantage of this time when no one was paying attention, Kondo felt relieved in his heart, ‘Great, no one is paying attention! I can also take the Princess away!’

However, just as Kondo took two steps with Bubbles, Kondo felt something fall from the legs of his hakama.

Kawaki and Yorozuya were also attracted by a piece of mosaic on the ground behind Kondo.

“Ah, what is that?” Gintoki asked doubtfully.

“It’s a turd-aru.” Kagura replied.

“Right.” Kawaki agreed.

‘I’m finished! I wore my hakama over boxers! It rolled out from the hakama,’ Kondo stopped, and his face was full of sweat.

“That… that seemed to have fallen out of your hakama just now.” Gintoki pointed at the long and mosaiced object on the ground.

“You even kicked it,” Kagura agreed.

“No, no, no, he is an adult,” Kawaki waved his hand and said casually, “How could he do such a thing?”

Hearing this, Kondo could not help but feel a little touched. But before he could finish being touched, he heard Kawaki continue to say, “That should be his banana, right?”

“How is it possible!” Gintoki knocked Kawaki with his fist, “Although both of them are mosaic objects, this is obviously a piece of poop! Whether in terms of shape or color, it is poop! Besides, even if it is a banana, how can it fall out of the pants!”

“Ah, now that you said that, it is indeed a bit like poop.” Kawaki nodded and replied, “But why is there poop here?”

As he spoke, Kawaki looked at Kondo. Gintoki and Kagura also looked at Kondo, and three pairs of eyes stared straight at Kondo.

Even if he did not turn around, Kondo could feel three strange gazes behind him.

‘If I don’t find an excuse, I will really be finished! I will never be able to lift my head for the rest of my life!’

At the same time, Kondo inadvertently glanced at Bubbles. He suddenly had a brilliant idea in his heart, ‘Forgive me! Princess!’

“Princess!” Kondo gritted his teeth and cursed. Then, he raised his foot and kicked Bubbles into the landscape lake on the side, “Didn’t I teach you not to defecate anywhere?!”

“I really don’t know what to do with you. You always defecate anywhere you want.” Kondo frowned and put on a helpless look, “This guy is really nerve-racking; I really don’t know what to do with her.”

Kawaki/ Kagura, “…”

“No, it obviously fell from you,” Gintoki retorted.

“Wait, Sakata-kun, don’t talk nonsense,” Kondo complained, “How old do you think I am? I am thirty years old. How can I do that?”

“No,” Kawaki pointed behind Kondo with an expressionless face, “See for yourself. You’re leaving a trail.”

“You guys have misunderstood,” Kondo quickly defended, “This is, you know, biscuits I left as markers on the road so I wouldn’t get lost.”

“Ah, You’re already lost. Lost on the path of life.” Gintoki scoffed with a look of disdain.

“You’re wrong, Gintoki.” Kawaki shook his head, then raised a finger and corrected him, “It should be a gorilla life.”

“There’s no difference at all!” Gintoki shouted.

However, just as he finished speaking, Gintoki felt that something was wrong. The others also realized something because a huge shadow appeared under everyone’s feet.

“Is today a cloudy day?” Kawaki muttered.

“The weather in Edo is really unpredictable. It will be sunny, and after a while, it will become cloudy.” Kondo waved his hand and said casually.

“No, this morning, anchor Ketsuno clearly said that today is a sunny day.” Gintoki propped up his chin and muttered.

“Do you really believe the weather forecast that relies on divination?” Kondo continued, “There is no scientific basis at all. Also, I only believe in her horoscope. I have never believed in the weather forecast.”

“There is no difference between you and Gintoki,” Kawaki commented expressionlessly.

However, soon after, everyone heard a loud roar coming from behind them.

“It’s so noisy,” Kawaki turned around and looked at Bubbles, who was behind them, and said with a face full of disdain. Then, he pulled out the umbrella at his waist, “Gintoki, prepare the fire. Kagura-chan, prepare the sauce. Gorilla, you… this has nothing to do with you. Just go to the side and concentrate on playing with your banana.”

“You… What are you going to do?” Kondo swallowed his saliva.

“Is there a need to ask? Of course, it’s an outdoor barbecue.” As Kawaki spoke, he raised the umbrella in his hand.

However, before Kawaki could swing his hand down, Kondo, who was at the side, hurriedly pulled Kawaki back, “Hey! Wait! That won’t do! Absolutely not!”

“I say you should also have a little backbone, okay?” Kawaki sighed softly and said earnestly, “When it is time to teach it a lesson, you should teach it a good lesson, right? Now it dares to shout at its owner; next time, it will dare to ride on your head and poop.”

“I won’t! I’ll teach it a lesson when I get back. I don’t need to trouble you!” Kondo hurriedly said.

“Then… alright.” Kawaki had no choice but to give up. He turned to look at Gintoki and Kagura, “Hey, let’s go.”




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