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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 39

Published at 18th of July 2022 06:34:11 AM


Chapter 39

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“No, that’s not what I meant…” Shinpachi quickly denied it.

“We don’t need to talk nonsense with an unscrupulous person. Even if he finds fault, he will be beaten.” Toshi crossed his arms and sighed, “It’s really been a long time since I last saw it.”

Sogo also nodded.

“No, it would be better to stab him,” Otae said.

“Wouldn’t it be better if it were crushed?” Toshi continued.

“Pluck it out and tear it to pieces.” Otae continued with a smile.

“Approach slowly, and smash him like a fly!”

Just as Toshi finished speaking, Shinpachi quickly separated the two of them, “Hey! The two of you are too terrifying!”

“Shinpachi is right. How can you do that kind of thing?! Just leave it to me after you catch him. I promise that he will never appear in this world again, forever.” Kawaki walked over and said with a smile.

“You are the most dangerous one, okay! I can’t even imagine it!” Shinpachi shouted, “Kawaki-san, why are you covered in dust?”

“Ah, it was really hard to bury [Something like a landmine] just now,” Kawaki said as he rubbed his waist.

At this time, Shinpachi looked into the bag on the ground. “Hey! Why is it empty? Did you bury all of them”

“Job completed-aru!” Kagura ran over, also covered in dust, and saluted Kawaki.

“Ok, ok, ok, go buy what you like.” Kawaki took out a few tens of thousands of yen bills and handed them to Kagura.

Taking the money, Kagura ran away excitedly.

“Report, the mission is complete!” Kondo also ran over covered in dust.

“Buy your favorite banana.” Kawaki took out a few coins and handed them to Kondo.

“Thank you!” Kondo took the coins and was about to leave, but he suddenly reacted, “Why do I want to buy a banana? I already said that I’m not a gorilla! I just look alike!”

However, Kawaki ignored him, “Then, let’s wait for that bastard to come!” After saying that, he chuckled, and Otae and Toshi also laughed.

“Hey, That’s enough you three! ”



At night, the bright moon hung in the sky.

A group of people lies in an ambush in the grass beside the wall. Not far from them was the main house. Under the eaves of the main house was a hanging clothing rack. On the clothing rack was a small panty that was used as bait.

“Why did you only bite me?” Gintoki slapped away the mosquito on his face and asked.

“Because Gin-chan, your blood is the sweetest-aru.” Kagura continued.

“Why hasn’t that perverted thief come yet? I can’t wait any longer.” Kawaki held his umbrella and looked around.

“You’re right,” Shinpachi rubbed his glasses, “Could it be that he won’t come today? Or perhaps he will never come?”

“What kind of joke is this” Kawaki said unhappy, “What about the free experience game I prepared for him?”

“Don’t worry, it will come,” Gintoki said.

“What right do you have to say that he will definitely come?” Shinpachi asked.

“There is such flashy underwear hanging here. How can the underwear thief miss it?” Kagura replied.

“It’s because it’s too obvious! It looks like a trap at first glance, okay!” Shinpachi retorted.

“Shin-chan. For thieves. The more difficult it is to achieve their goals, the more excited they will be,” Otae said.

“I see, it’s exactly the same as the Phantom Thief Kid~” Kawaki echoed.”I knew there was a trap, but I still had to go.”

“Right, Right, Right.” Except for Shinpachi, everyone held their hands and nodded.

“Why do you set him up on your own initiative?!” Shinpachi retorted, “What if he is a coward?”

“Don’t worry. If he doesn’t come, wouldn’t it be enough to blow up the entire Edo?” Kawaki patted Shinpachi on the shoulder and said.

At the same time, he looked at Sogo beside him, “Is that so? Okita-kun~”

“Boss, what you said makes sense~ Not only the underwear thief, even Hijikata-san can go to heaven~ Then I will become am Shinsengumi’s vice-captain~” Sogo replied with a refreshing face.

“That’s enough! You two are natural S!” Shinpachi could not help but say, “If we blow up Edo, Shinsengumi will be gone!”

“That makes sense.” Sogo pinched his chin and said. But suddenly, he had a flash of inspiration, “Then we can just blow up Hijikata-san in the other places besides Shinsengumi.”

“Don’t worry, I will arrange a place for you to live when the time comes.” Kawaki patted his chest and promised.

“I didn’t mean that…”

Before Shinpachi could finish, he was interrupted by Gintoki.

“Don’t shout. What if you scare the thief away?” Gintoki frowned and said impatiently.

“I want to kill you. It’s such a hot day and we still have to wait here.” Shinpachi turned to Gintoki and said.

“What did you say, bastard? How about I ventilate your face!” As he spoke, Gintoki and Shinpachi began to fight.

On the side, Sogo and Toshi had already started to fight, while Kawaki was adding oil to the fire, “It’s enough to cut off the bangs. Why is it cutting the neck every time? Your swordsmanship is really not good, Okita-kun.”

In short, just like this, the small fight turned into a big fight, and everyone except Kondo participated.

“Hey, stop, no fighting.” Kondo, who became an idler, persuaded them, “Because the weather is too hot, everyone is in a bad mood, right? Alright, let’s take a break.”

However, the crowd still did not stop fighting, but a few different voices came from the chaotic battle…

Kawaki, “Shut up, gorilla!”

Gintoki, “Shut up, loser!”

Otae, “Shut up, ass hair!”

Kagura, “Shut up, mite beards!”

Toshiro, “Shut up, miso bread!”

Sogo, “Shut up, gorilla!”

Kawaki: “I already said it!”

Sogo: “Oh, then shut up, chimpanzee.”

Kondo’s face became darker and darker, and finally, tears burst out, “It’s all because the weather is too hot. That’s should be it. Oh, why don’t I get something cold? So that everyone can calm down a little.”

Kawaki, “Ice Coke!”

Kagura, “Azuki bean ice cream!!”

Gintoki, “Any Parfait-like!”

Otae, “Haagen-Dazs ice cream!”

Sogo, “The more expensive, the better!”

Toshiro, “Large beef bowl with mayonnaise, and a 500ml large bottle of drink!”

Shinpachi, “I want tea!”

“Alright, alright. I’ll buy it right away. Be good.” As Kondo spoke, he turned around and left. At the same time, he kept muttering, “I really can’t do anything to these guys.” However, just as he finished speaking, he heard the sound of [beep beep beep beep beep] coming from beneath his feet. Then, a huge explosion sounded.

Everyone stopped playing around and looked at Kondo who was lying on the ground in the bomb pit.

“Ah, Kondo has exploded.” Otae covered her mouth and pretended to be surprised.

“It must be because of the hot weather-aru.” Kagura waved her hand and said.

“So it exploded,” Toshi continued.

“How is that possible? Did he step on the landmines that he buried himself?” Gintoki said, “He doesn’t know where he buried it, but he still walked around randomly. What an idiot.”

After saying that, everyone laughed at the same time.

“Ah? Wait a minute,” Shinpachi asked, “Could it be that no one remembers where the mines were buried?”

At this time, everyone finally reacted.

“Oops, the grandfather who delivers the newspaper tomorrow will step on it,” Otae said.

“Don’t worry! Isn’t there this wall?” As Kawaki spoke, he patted the wall behind him and jumped up to stand on the wall. At the same time, Kawaki heard the sound of [beep beep beep beep] below his feet…

Kawaki fell to the ground…

“Why, why are there mines on the walls?” Kawaki got up and asked intermittently.

“Didn’t you say that you won’t let go of any place?” Kagura raised her hand and said.

“Is it all your fault” Shinpachi shouted, “Wait a minute, so other than this area…” Shinpachi looked at the entire courtyard, “Have all the mines been buried”

However, at this moment, a man’s laughter came from the roof, “Hahahahaha…”

“That guy, that guy is…” Shinpachi said in disbelief.

At this moment, a man with a bright red loincloth covering his face and only wearing a brief jumped in. However, before he could say anything, he heard a [beep beep beep beep] sound. Next was the sound of a huge explosion.

“That… is there also a landmine on the roof?” Shinpachi asked with a black face.

“Yes, because we can’t let go of any place.” Kagura nodded and said.

“Hey! If we do this, our family house will be blasted into the sky!” Shinpachi shouted.

“A small sacrifice is inevitable. Besides, if it’s about compensation, the gorilla will bear it.” Kawaki wiped his nose and said.

“Even if you say that…” Shinpachi pouted and said, “Ah, now is not the time to talk about this! How is the underwear thief? Did someone go to see him? There seems to be no sound.”

“They are bombs in all places. How can anyone be stupid enough to go over and look?” Kawaki snorted and said.

“Who is to blame! Who is to blame for all this!” Shinpachi shouted angrily.

“Don’t worry. I just called the police. It is said that the Shinsengumi captain and vice-captain will come here to remove the mines,” Kawaki replied.

“Hey, these two people are here now, right?” Shinpachi shouted again.

“Huh? Really?” Kawaki said in surprise.

“Hey! Is it really okay to pretend to be surprised”

“Hahaha, this is far from difficult…” The voice of the perverted underwear thief just sounded and took a step forward, then the [beep beep beep beep beep] sounded again…

“Hey, I can’t even see! How many times has it been! This is too miserable! His entire body must be injured!” Shinpachi covered his eyes and said.

“I won’t give up… Just these alone won’t be able to defeat me!” Finally, the man stood up again, and the man who moved one step at a time was only a few steps away from reaching the eaves.

“Stop! If this goes on, you will… die!” Gintoki shouted.

“All the perverts, otakus, cherry boys, and delusional horny S.O.B.’s across the country await my return! Their… voices… are giving me strength…” As he spoke, the underwear thief staggered forward again.

[Beep beep beep beep]…

Boom…

“That, it seems to have really ended…” Shinpachi could not help but say.

“Ah, it’s really over.”

“It’s really over.”

Everyone said at once.

“Then, what should we do?” Shinpachi asked again.

“Right, what should we do?”

“That’s right, what should we do?”

“What a headache. What should we do?”

Everyone started talking again.

“Don’t worry. Isn’t this a gorilla demining machine?” Kawaki pointed to Kondo who was still lying in the pit.

“Really! I didn’t expect there would be a gorilla demining machine here. Kawaki-san’s eyes are so good.” Otae praised.

“Then, please, gorilla!”



That night, the entire Edo heard the screams of a gorilla and the continuous explosions…



Yoshiwara.

“Well, Tsu-chan, I seem to have put your panty in the wrong place and put them in Kawaki-san’s room…” Hinowa seemed to have thought of something and suddenly said, “I wanted to wash them together with Kawaki-san’s dirty clothes, but I forgot where your panty was…”

Tsukuyo, “…”

Seita, “…”




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