Chapter 224
‘Doesn’t he realize how we’ve drifted apart? Or, perhaps he forgot…’
Of course, there wasn’t much I wanted to say to him now. The reigning factor in why Han Kiseok and I drifted apart was how he had spread rumors and talked behind my back…
‘Although, before then, he seemed to be tired of me…’
Han Kiseok already had a clique that suited his status. Though he had somehow gotten along with me and talked with me often, he still was close with his other friends.
Furthermore, Han Kiseok would completely ignore me while he hung with his crowd. Even if he ran into me while with his friends, he didn’t even bother including me in their activities. Therefore, while Han Kiseok talked with his friends, I stood, alienated, until he called for me again.
‘And, most damningly, he’d stand at the front and tell his friends about my issues…’
And I would have to listen to that from the back of the group.
Honestly, I couldn’t remember what Han Kiseok said in detail now. It’d been so long–and I didn’t think it was that shocking that he thought of me like that.
After all, even when Han Kiseok acted kindly to me, he often belittled or acted superior to me. After that night-to-dawn moment when I had revealed all my insecurities and problems, he began to act a bit colder. There were days when he wouldn’t contact me for one or two days at a time. It was as if…
…He wanted me to stop leaning on him for support.
Therefore, rather than Han Kiseok’s actions, I was more shocked by his friends’ reactions. Their unsurprised giggling and gossiping…it was as if they had heard him complain many times before… That was perhaps the larger contributor to my shock and sense of betrayal.
AD
He probably wouldn’t understand if I were to bring up this by-gone history. He’d probably shrug his shoulders as if he saw nothing wrong with his actions.
It would have honestly been less shocking if Han Kiseok had hit me. If he hated me–despised me–then at least he saw me as an equal. When I had begun to think of him as something between ‘friend’ and ‘lover,’ he had not even thought of me as a ‘friend.’ The misery I felt that day…
Even if Han Kiseok hadn’t contacted me from that day on, he wasn’t one to usually initiate contact in the first place.
Because we had drifted away under those conditions, I wasn’t pleased that Han Kiseok had DM’d me. I thought about sending him scathing words or perhaps just ignoring him… Or, honestly, I wanted to move on from this conversation–as if nothing happened–after exchanging some superficial small talk.
In any case, I wasn’t happy to see him at all. It wasn’t that I haven’t moved on from the events of that day, but…
‘To be honest, it’s still a dark blot on my personal history…’
I suppose I was embarrassed by my clumsiness and naivete. My face inadvertently heated up when I remembered how I couldn’t hide my affections and sent him notes or letters.
Han Kiseok was like a highschool diary; he probably remembered all the stupid ways I acted–things I attempted to blot out of my memory. Perhaps he thought of me from time to time. Something like…
‘In the past, I had a guy who liked me.’
Well, I suppose that would be all he’d have to say about me…
[Choi Lee-kyung: hi hi] 1
So, after much consideration, I simply gave him a casual greeting. In reality, I wanted to ignore him…but I still had too many lingering grudges to simply ignore him.
""
However, it wasn’t like I wanted to receive an apology for the scars he had given me in the past. I just wanted to show Han Kiseok–in the past he had treated me like a nobody; I wanted to clearly show him that I was over him. I wanted to make him think, ‘Choi Lee-kyung must not like me anymore.’
[Choi Lee-kyung: Yah, it’s been a year since I’ve become a User lolol]
Therefore, I forced myself to sound friendly and relaxed, adding [lolol] to the end of my response.
Also, I used to have the habit of telling Han Kiseok everything that had happened to me, even before the other asked… If he remembered that, perhaps he’d feel a lack of warmth in my words.
Han Kiseok replied to me about 2 minutes later.
[Han Kiseok: I searched you up on the System network–I see you’re not part of a guild yet.]
[Han Kiseok: Also you’re a Necromancer?]
I was totally pissed off. “Hahhh?!!”
Han Kiseok already knew that my prospects as a User was low; he didn’t even deign ignorance. My plan to pretend chicness and nonchalance was suddenly torn apart at the mention of my specifications.
It was customary for Users to enter small social guilds or medium-sized career guilds; furthermore, my class was the worst. Even ordinary people knew that Necromancer was a future-less class. Put together, Han Kiseok’s two questions gained a new meaning.
[You don’t have a guild…]
[And your class is the worst too… Are you able to properly feed yourself?]
AD
It was the same as if he said that.
[Choi Lee-kyung: yeye lolol the daily routine of being in a guild just doesn’t suit me lolol]
So, even though I was trembling with fury, I tried to respond coolly. And, Han Kiseok connivingly responded with seemingly kind words.
[Han Kiseok: That’s right, lolol, particularly disciplined places are difficult to handle]
[Han Kiseok: You’re in the hub right now, right?]
[Han Kiseok: Your mom is worried because you haven’t been visiting recently.]
Then, if you consider what Han Kiseok knews about my specs, he probably meant
[You’re too ashamed to go home…]
Or, at least, that was my interpretation.
I immediately thought about the money Seo Dawon had given me and the corporate card Koo Hui-seo gave me–to spend as much as I pleased. Halfway through typing all that, I eventually deleted everything. It was money I couldn’t even brag about… I couldn’t even send more than 30 million won to my mom because I was afraid I’d get caught… Damn.
[Choi Lee-kyung: Yah, lolol, I’ve had no time because I’ve been too busy in the dungeons lolol]
[Choi Lee-kyung: I’ve been raiding 3 dungeons a week–I’m so frazzled lolololol]
AD
Still, I tried to respond nonchalantly, roleplaying a freelancer with too much scheduled on their timetable. Then, I went overboard and even sent an emoticon of a hamster running on its wheel, squeaking [I’m busy, too busy!]. After I sent him that, I felt a bit of shame rolling through me… Who the heck even bought this emote sticker set? I bet it was Kim Olim. Damn…
[Han Kiseok: lolololol]
[Han Kiseok: I guess you’re pretty busy]
[Han Kiseok: Still, do you think you’d have the time to see me once?]
It didn’t seem that Han Kiseok was affected by my words very much. He took everything I said as truth and refreshingly countered by asking to meet–it really did seem like he had forgotten about our past.
No–he could have simply searched me out of curiosity after hearing I became a User. Now that he’d seen what horrible situation I was in, though, perhaps he wanted to ridicule me.
[Choi Lee-kyung: lololol Yeah, let’s eat out sometime lolololol]
[Han Kiseok: Do you have time this weekend?]
Han Kiseok’s desire to meet must not have been mere empty words; he tried to schedule a set time. I had no idea he’d press for a specific time; I could only hesitate and respond [The weekend?]. Han Kiseok didn’t back down.
[Han Kiseok: I don’t mind meeting in the middle of the week either.]
[Han Kiseok: I should use all my years of experiences, keke]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Well…]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Wait lolol I’ll check my schedule lolol]
[Han Kiseok: Ah, also, let’s add each other as a friend through the system.]
AD
[Han Kiseok: SNS 2 is for common folk, not Users.]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Huh?]
[Han Kiseok: Don’t wanna?]
[Choi Lee-kyung: As if. Lololololol]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Go-go!]
[Han Kiseok: Sent lololol]
He had even asked me to accept his [Friend Request].
For some reason, I didn’t want to back down either, so I accepted his request…. But, looking at the ‘friend’ tab on my status window–[Kim Sangyoon], [Moon Issak], [Han Kiseok]… To be honest, I felt incredibly dismal for the future. None of those people became my ‘friend’ for genuine reasons.
In addition, while browsing through the [Friend Request] section, I was flustered to see Koo Hui-seo’s name in the ‘Waiting for Acceptance’ section. How long ago had [Koo Hui-seo] sent a request?
[Han Kiseok: hi hi]
Meanwhile, Han Kiseok left our social media DMs and greeted me over the [Friend Chat] window in the system. Even though inwardly I knew nothing good could come of this situation, I continued to talk to him. And, swept along in the flow of that conversation, we even made an appointment to see each other at the Hub this Saturday…
Eventually, our conversation finished, and I tugged at my hair. This wasn’t it! I only wanted to chicly say to him, ‘I’m not that Choi Lee-kyung who desperately clung onto you, anymore~’…
Chapter 224
‘Doesn’t he realize how we’ve drifted apart? Or, perhaps he forgot…’
Of course, there wasn’t much I wanted to say to him now. The reigning factor in why Han Kiseok and I drifted apart was how he had spread rumors and talked behind my back…
‘Although, before then, he seemed to be tired of me…’
Han Kiseok already had a clique that suited his status. Though he had somehow gotten along with me and talked with me often, he still was close with his other friends.
Furthermore, Han Kiseok would completely ignore me while he hung with his crowd. Even if he ran into me while with his friends, he didn’t even bother including me in their activities. Therefore, while Han Kiseok talked with his friends, I stood, alienated, until he called for me again.
‘And, most damningly, he’d stand at the front and tell his friends about my issues…’
And I would have to listen to that from the back of the group.
Honestly, I couldn’t remember what Han Kiseok said in detail now. It’d been so long–and I didn’t think it was that shocking that he thought of me like that.
After all, even when Han Kiseok acted kindly to me, he often belittled or acted superior to me. After that night-to-dawn moment when I had revealed all my insecurities and problems, he began to act a bit colder. There were days when he wouldn’t contact me for one or two days at a time. It was as if…
…He wanted me to stop leaning on him for support.
Therefore, rather than Han Kiseok’s actions, I was more shocked by his friends’ reactions. Their unsurprised giggling and gossiping…it was as if they had heard him complain many times before… That was perhaps the larger contributor to my shock and sense of betrayal.
AD
He probably wouldn’t understand if I were to bring up this by-gone history. He’d probably shrug his shoulders as if he saw nothing wrong with his actions.
It would have honestly been less shocking if Han Kiseok had hit me. If he hated me–despised me–then at least he saw me as an equal. When I had begun to think of him as something between ‘friend’ and ‘lover,’ he had not even thought of me as a ‘friend.’ The misery I felt that day…
Even if Han Kiseok hadn’t contacted me from that day on, he wasn’t one to usually initiate contact in the first place.
Because we had drifted away under those conditions, I wasn’t pleased that Han Kiseok had DM’d me. I thought about sending him scathing words or perhaps just ignoring him… Or, honestly, I wanted to move on from this conversation–as if nothing happened–after exchanging some superficial small talk.
In any case, I wasn’t happy to see him at all. It wasn’t that I haven’t moved on from the events of that day, but…
‘To be honest, it’s still a dark blot on my personal history…’
I suppose I was embarrassed by my clumsiness and naivete. My face inadvertently heated up when I remembered how I couldn’t hide my affections and sent him notes or letters.
Han Kiseok was like a highschool diary; he probably remembered all the stupid ways I acted–things I attempted to blot out of my memory. Perhaps he thought of me from time to time. Something like…
‘In the past, I had a guy who liked me.’
Well, I suppose that would be all he’d have to say about me…
[Choi Lee-kyung: hi hi] 1
So, after much consideration, I simply gave him a casual greeting. In reality, I wanted to ignore him…but I still had too many lingering grudges to simply ignore him.
""
However, it wasn’t like I wanted to receive an apology for the scars he had given me in the past. I just wanted to show Han Kiseok–in the past he had treated me like a nobody; I wanted to clearly show him that I was over him. I wanted to make him think, ‘Choi Lee-kyung must not like me anymore.’
[Choi Lee-kyung: Yah, it’s been a year since I’ve become a User lolol]
Therefore, I forced myself to sound friendly and relaxed, adding [lolol] to the end of my response.
Also, I used to have the habit of telling Han Kiseok everything that had happened to me, even before the other asked… If he remembered that, perhaps he’d feel a lack of warmth in my words.
Han Kiseok replied to me about 2 minutes later.
[Han Kiseok: I searched you up on the System network–I see you’re not part of a guild yet.]
[Han Kiseok: Also you’re a Necromancer?]
I was totally pissed off. “Hahhh?!!”
Han Kiseok already knew that my prospects as a User was low; he didn’t even deign ignorance. My plan to pretend chicness and nonchalance was suddenly torn apart at the mention of my specifications.
It was customary for Users to enter small social guilds or medium-sized career guilds; furthermore, my class was the worst. Even ordinary people knew that Necromancer was a future-less class. Put together, Han Kiseok’s two questions gained a new meaning.
[You don’t have a guild…]
[And your class is the worst too… Are you able to properly feed yourself?]
AD
It was the same as if he said that.
[Choi Lee-kyung: yeye lolol the daily routine of being in a guild just doesn’t suit me lolol]
So, even though I was trembling with fury, I tried to respond coolly. And, Han Kiseok connivingly responded with seemingly kind words.
[Han Kiseok: That’s right, lolol, particularly disciplined places are difficult to handle]
[Han Kiseok: You’re in the hub right now, right?]
[Han Kiseok: Your mom is worried because you haven’t been visiting recently.]
Then, if you consider what Han Kiseok knews about my specs, he probably meant
[You’re too ashamed to go home…]
Or, at least, that was my interpretation.
I immediately thought about the money Seo Dawon had given me and the corporate card Koo Hui-seo gave me–to spend as much as I pleased. Halfway through typing all that, I eventually deleted everything. It was money I couldn’t even brag about… I couldn’t even send more than 30 million won to my mom because I was afraid I’d get caught… Damn.
[Choi Lee-kyung: Yah, lolol, I’ve had no time because I’ve been too busy in the dungeons lolol]
[Choi Lee-kyung: I’ve been raiding 3 dungeons a week–I’m so frazzled lolololol]
AD
Still, I tried to respond nonchalantly, roleplaying a freelancer with too much scheduled on their timetable. Then, I went overboard and even sent an emoticon of a hamster running on its wheel, squeaking [I’m busy, too busy!]. After I sent him that, I felt a bit of shame rolling through me… Who the heck even bought this emote sticker set? I bet it was Kim Olim. Damn…
[Han Kiseok: lolololol]
[Han Kiseok: I guess you’re pretty busy]
[Han Kiseok: Still, do you think you’d have the time to see me once?]
It didn’t seem that Han Kiseok was affected by my words very much. He took everything I said as truth and refreshingly countered by asking to meet–it really did seem like he had forgotten about our past.
No–he could have simply searched me out of curiosity after hearing I became a User. Now that he’d seen what horrible situation I was in, though, perhaps he wanted to ridicule me.
[Choi Lee-kyung: lololol Yeah, let’s eat out sometime lolololol]
[Han Kiseok: Do you have time this weekend?]
Han Kiseok’s desire to meet must not have been mere empty words; he tried to schedule a set time. I had no idea he’d press for a specific time; I could only hesitate and respond [The weekend?]. Han Kiseok didn’t back down.
[Han Kiseok: I don’t mind meeting in the middle of the week either.]
[Han Kiseok: I should use all my years of experiences, keke]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Well…]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Wait lolol I’ll check my schedule lolol]
[Han Kiseok: Ah, also, let’s add each other as a friend through the system.]
AD
[Han Kiseok: SNS 2 is for common folk, not Users.]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Huh?]
[Han Kiseok: Don’t wanna?]
[Choi Lee-kyung: As if. Lololololol]
[Choi Lee-kyung: Go-go!]
[Han Kiseok: Sent lololol]
He had even asked me to accept his [Friend Request].
For some reason, I didn’t want to back down either, so I accepted his request…. But, looking at the ‘friend’ tab on my status window–[Kim Sangyoon], [Moon Issak], [Han Kiseok]… To be honest, I felt incredibly dismal for the future. None of those people became my ‘friend’ for genuine reasons.
In addition, while browsing through the [Friend Request] section, I was flustered to see Koo Hui-seo’s name in the ‘Waiting for Acceptance’ section. How long ago had [Koo Hui-seo] sent a request?
[Han Kiseok: hi hi]
Meanwhile, Han Kiseok left our social media DMs and greeted me over the [Friend Chat] window in the system. Even though inwardly I knew nothing good could come of this situation, I continued to talk to him. And, swept along in the flow of that conversation, we even made an appointment to see each other at the Hub this Saturday…
Eventually, our conversation finished, and I tugged at my hair. This wasn’t it! I only wanted to chicly say to him, ‘I’m not that Choi Lee-kyung who desperately clung onto you, anymore~’…
