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Pat Me Please - Chapter 1

Published at 5th of May 2023 05:45:02 AM


Chapter 1

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“Two of Characters.”

“Eight bamboos.”

“Pung.”

“Put it down, I won.”

Yu Zhou reached out to pick up the tile, pushed the eight bamboos precisely into the slot with her right hand, and calculated quickly while everyone was leaning forward: “All same suit with big pair, eight-fold limit, two kongs, one visible and one concealed, three tiles each for each player, pay up.”

“Darn, you’re playing hard.”

“What luck.”

Complaints on the table were heard one after another. Huo Guo shook the empty box, “No money, we owe it.”

“Transfer, I’m done.” Yu Zhou said.

“Win and run?” Huo Guo grudgingly took out her phone.

Yu Zhou opened the group chat, staring at her while she finished transferring the money, put her phone in her pocket, and stood up to walk outside the rolling door. “Wanwan is in heat, I don’t know if she’ll pee everywhere. I have to go back and keep an eye on her.”

Wanwan was a small female cat that her sister entrusted to her to take care of. When her sister went to the city, she said she would take care of it for two weeks, and now it has been almost three months.

The little female cat was not spayed and would go into heat once a month. After all, it was not her own cat, so Yu Zhou could not take it to have surgery. She could only open a video online, clumsily patting its… rear end according to the scientific explanation.

Whether it could relieve the symptoms was uncertain, but after two or three times, Wanwan looked at her with a loving gaze.

Yu Zhou put on her mask, watched a few friends come out, and Huo Guo pulled down the rolling door with a bang, sounding like thunder. She then locked the door by bending down and using her foot.

“Once you go back, when can we meet again, big writer?” Huo Guo held a lollipop in her mouth, as if holding a cigarette.

“Writer my foot.” Yu Zhou put her hands in her pockets, realizing she had forgotten to call a taxi.

After resigning and staying at home for a few months, she seemed to be not very proficient in some basic life skills. At this moment, she began to call a taxi on the street, and she looked a bit embarrassed.

Yu Zhou was not a writer, but a writer-for-hire. She couldn’t say what the big difference was, but there was one.

When she talked about quitting her job to write full-time, her former boss stared at her with green bean eyes and pushed his glasses, asking her, “Can you make a lot of money writing novels?”

She nodded vaguely.

The former boss looked like she had reached for the high branch, and with a look of someone who has hidden talents in a small department, he reluctantly bid her farewell.

Whether writing novels could make a lot of money or not was uncertain, but she forgot to tell her former boss that she had not signed a contract.

“I’m done for now.” just these four words.

And the excuse of writing novels was to make her life seem more valuable.

After thinking for a while, the taxi arrived. Being a writer had indeed exercised her imagination, making the wait for a taxi less boring.

She waved goodbye to her friends and got into the car, leaning against the window and enjoying the breeze.

In August and September, the air in Jiangcheng was usually filled with the smell of firecrackers, making it so dry it could catch fire. But this year, there was too much rain, and it smelled like wet firecrackers.

Yu Zhou went back to her community against the sticky wind. Her bangs were blown upright, making her look like a fool. She tried several times to press them down in the elevator door mirror but failed, so she resigned herself to keeping her bangs up and opened the door.

The fingerprint had to be pressed for the second time before the lock recognized her.

“The door has been opened,” a flat female voice said.

Yu Zhou kicked off her shoes, changed into slippers at the entrance, and hung her mask on the hook, thinking that she could use it for the next nucleic acid test.

As she took off her clothes, she shouted, “Wanwan, Wanwan!”

But Wanwan did not come out to greet her as usual.

She looked up and saw a woman sitting on the sofa.

“Fuck,” she said, her hands still crossing the hem of her clothes, which were about to be taken off.

This gesture was not appropriate for cursing, but her legs were a little weak. If she did not curse, she might have to kneel down.

The woman sat upright on the leather sofa, covered with a layer of blanket, with an ancient hair bun and pearl hairpins swaying, wearing a dark red collar dress from an unknown dynasty, with many layers and complex folds. At this moment, she also looked a little panicked as she stared at Yu Zhou.

Suddenly, Yu Zhou was scared into laughter.

“Hehehehahaha.” Her laughter came from her chest and was more eerie than the woman who suddenly appeared.

She did not want to laugh, but she had always been like this since she was a child. When her legs cramped to the extreme, or when she was scared to the extreme by horror movies, she wanted to laugh.

Perhaps because laughing was more lively and could boost her courage.

The woman was startled, her neck slightly tilted backward, and her face turned pale.

Damn… she looks more like a ghost now.

Yu Zhou put her hand on the door lock, sensing it several times but could not find the infrared port. So, she held onto the handle tightly and asked the girl on the sofa, “Who are you?”

Her brain quickly analyzed whether she was a person or a ghost.

It couldn’t be a ghost. The entrance of a ghost would not be like this. She had written a lot of supernatural stories, and it usually needed to create some momentum. Moreover, she looked quite scared, and she had only heard ghosts scaring people, never the other way around.

If it was a person…

It would be easier to deal with. She was a girl who was half a head shorter than her. If they fought, she should not lose.

So she tried to calm down and squeezed out a relaxed smile, “Is it possible that you are in the wrong place?”

The girl looked at her, swept her up and down, and finally met her eyes. “I think I might be in the wrong place,” she said.

Her voice was so nice, like a voice actor’s. It was also ancient and elegant, refreshing the sticky summer night.

Yu Zhou took her hand off the door lock, held her phone, and spoke kindly, “So, are you not going back?”

She suddenly thought of another possibility. What if this girl was crazy?

She had gone to the wrong place and sat in someone else’s house without moving.

The girl glanced at her, her watery eyes drooping, and did not speak.

Yu Zhou quietly stepped on the ground, her legs no longer weak. She walked to the dining table, pulled out a chair and sat down. “Are you having some difficulties?” she asked.

“Yes,” the girl nodded.

“What’s wrong?” Yu Zhou frowned. “Were you kicked out of the home for playing cosplay?”

The girl looked up and shook her head. “I don’t understand.”

Yu Zhou sighed and rolled up her sleeves. “Are you feeling hot?”

“Yes,” the girl hesitated.

“Let’s turn on the air conditioning. I’m feeling hot too.”

“Air… conditioning?”

Yu Zhou pointed and said, “That thing next to your hand, the long strip. Yeah, pick it up. See the yellow button in the middle? Press it. Beep… it’s done.”

As she waited for the cool breeze, she wondered why she had narrated the instructions for the remote control out loud.

The girl, on the other hand, was startled and shivered. She held the remote control awkwardly, shifting her feet and staring at the air outlet with vigilance.

“Do you know magic?” The girl asked, her eyes brightening with courage.

“Magic?” 

“You can summon the wind and call for the rain.”

“Hahaha.” Yu Zhou laughed and then stopped after two laughs, “What a joke. You’re the one who knows magic. Now tell me, how did you get here?”

“I was going to bed, and then it thundered outside. When I opened my eyes, I was here.”

“Oh,” Yu Zhou looked at her with indescribable emotions. “You got struck by lightning?”

“Not exactly,” the girl said. Although the lightning didn’t hit her directly, she decided to go along with Yu Zhou’s crazed demeanor. “You could say it that way.”

“If that’s what you think.”

“I think?” I think? Yu Zhou was getting angry. “Do you know what I’m thinking right now?” 

“No,” the girl replied.

“Call the police.”

“Cu…”, The girl hesitated and bit her lips in confusion. “Cuddle?…” 1

Yu Zhou was impatient. “Why are you always making bad puns? Pun jokes, leave my world.”

“I…” The girl was at a loss, as if she was about to cry.

Yu Zhou realized she had been too harsh and calmed herself down, went over the whole thing from beginning to end. “You came to my house in the middle of the night and I didn’t drive you away, right? That shows that I’m a kind, warm, low-key, righteous and good person. Am I not?”

“…Yes,” the girl admitted.

“You look good, speak clearly, and your mind doesn’t seem to have any problems. Since you have difficulties, just say it. Don’t beat around the bush. How can we solve this?”

“I…” The girl hesitated.

“If you don’t leave, how can I sleep?”

“I…” The girl pondered for a moment, made up her mind, and began to speak: “My name is Xiang Wan, born in the 24th year of the Xin Yuan era, 18 years old this year. My father, Xiang Yu, is the prime minister of the current court, and my mother, Hua, is the eldest daughter of Princess Zhao Hua of Gaozong. My older brother, Xiang Pi, is currently the supervisor of the salt industry and the imperial censor, and he is still unmarried, but he is with…”

“Stop.”

She started reciting her family tree.

Yu Zhou propped her chin with her left hand, biting the dead skin on her lips, and remained silent for a while. When she looked up, her tone had changed: “What you said, is it true?”

“Yes.” Xiang Wan nodded.

Yu Zhou took out her phone, opened the calling interface in front of her, pressed the numbers 1-1-0 2, and put her index finger on the dial button expressionlessly. “Is it true?”

Xiang Wan looked at her actions inexplicably, a little curious about the thing in her hand, but it was only for a moment, and she looked at her seriously and said, “Yes, it’s true.”

Yu Zhou turned the phone in her hand and locked the screen.

She wouldn’t call the police. She didn’t dare.

“Xin Yuan, which dynasty is it again?”

“The Li Dynasty.”

“Oh, yes, I memorized it in high school textbooks.”

Xiang Wan felt uncomfortable and moved her neck.

“So, you time traveled?” Yu Zhou drew her conclusion, pursing her lips.

That’s the good thing about writers, they have a broad knowledge.

“Time…”

“That is, from one time and space to another.”

The time-traveling novels never said that the people who traveled through time were like idiots and couldn’t understand anything.

“Then,” Xiang Wan looked around and her face was still pale, “maybe. Now it is…”

“The year 2022.”

She held onto the armrest of the sofa, as if struck by lightning, “Then what about my parents?”

“If nothing unexpected happened, they should be dead.”

Xiang Wan held onto her chest and wiped her tears with her sleeves.

Yu Zhou began to have a headache.

Her waist also started to ache. She urgently needed to lie down in bed.

“Okay, I won’t call the police tonight, and you can stay here for now. Walk straight to the end, turn right, it’s the second bedroom, there’s no bed, you’ll have to make it yourself. There’s a way to test whether what you said is true. Come out with me tomorrow.”

Xiang Wan blinked her teary eyes and listened to her sobbing. When she finished speaking, she choked up and asked, “What’s the way?”

“The hairpin on your head, clanking and rattling, give me one tomorrow, I’ll go to the antique market to see if it’s an antique. Hahaha.” At the end, Yu Zhou laughed.

For some reason, it touched her funny bone.

Xiang Wan sniffed and watched her laugh, feeling very sad in her heart. But she had no other choice at the moment, she was alone and helpless, so she had to go along with her, and nodded accordingly.

“Oh, where’s Wanwan?” Yu Zhou stood up.

Xiang Wan took a breath. Did they get so close just by meeting by chance?

“Oh, my sister’s cat, named Wanwan. The wan 3 for eating.”

“It always rubs against me and I’m scared, so I put it in the cabinet.”

Yu Zhou exclaimed, “Which cabinet?”

Xiang Wan pointed to the side.

“That’s my…” Closet for clothes. Not just any clothes, but clothes that need dry cleaning to maintain her appearance.

Yu Zhou walked over with a helpless expression, opened the cabinet, and as expected, the crisp and tidy shirt and black coat that had been hung up were covered in Wanwan’s fur, with clumps of cat hair piled on top of them.

She carried Wanwan out and turned to Xiang Wan with a gentle smile.

“What, what’s wrong?” Xiang Wan’s heart skipped a beat.

“Nothing,” Yu Zhou carried the cat and walked towards the master bedroom.

When that hairpin is sold, I should split some of the money, she thought.

1. Call the police(baojing) and cuddle(baojin) here have similar pronounciation in Chinese

2. Number to call the police like 911

3. Means bowl in Chinese




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