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Sovereign of Wrath - Chapter 11

Published at 24th of February 2023 06:01:57 AM


Chapter 11

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MadMaxine Content Warning:

Spoiler

First-person depiction of a panic attack

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“Why is it called Korzon Island anyway?” I leaned against the rail of the ship and looked out over the ocean.

“Some guy sighted it and stuck his name on it.” Seyari leaned on the same railing about two meters away.

I sighed and looked back out over the waves. Didn’t seem like she was interested in conversation. No one was, really. I’d gotten plenty of looks due to my height and probably some other reasons I’d rather not think about, but no one approached me. It’d been three days aboard the Swordfish and I felt boredom setting in. Unlike the boredom of the island, I was stuck in one place and confined to my human glamour. Plus, I was surrounded by people I couldn’t talk to due to a language barrier. At least on the island I could go wherever and do whatever I pleased, even if the loneliness was crushing some days.

Seyari and Lorelei were my only options and the latter had been shut in her cabin the whole time and showed no signs of reappearing. I’d been given a simple hammock in the same small cabin as Seyari and Salvador for my own lodgings. The rocking at night made me feel ill, but I’d otherwise done alright for my first time on a ship. At least I thought so. I had no trouble balancing after the first few hours.

Thankfully, my glamour hadn’t slipped, but I could feel myself getting tired. Thankfully my well-known lack of rest made the dark bags under my eyes easy to play off. I’d also been given some more proper clothes, sort of.

Turns out Juan, the crewmate I met on the first day, was handy with a needle and I was now sporting a much more comfortable, if patchwork, blouse and trousers with mostly proper undergarments. Around my chest was an improvised loose wrap. Having it gave me a measure of comfort I hadn’t really even considered. Most of it was psychological over physical support, but I was too much a strange combination of excited and exhausted to pay the feeling any mind.

I had, however, learned that my bust was bigger relative to my body than I had thought. I resolved to be absurdly proud about this and my apparently rather wide hips later. Some of the doorways on the boat were a squeeze and a duck, and although it was clear they weren’t exactly large in the first place, I took a small measure of pride in my stature.

At least I didn’t have to help out with sailing the ship. Not that I’d have the first clue how to do it. I’d managed to at least get in and help the kitchen with clean up and meal prep for something to do, but my lack of communication made it more difficult than it ought to be.

I’d heard Captain Ojed spoke Ordian from Lorelei when we were boarding. I didn’t think it appropriate to bug him, but since it was so calm and clear today, I figured I might as well try.

I bumped into Salvador coming up from below decks on my way to bother the captain.

“Renna,” He said and then paused briefly. “I may teach you Cavenish? Could you teach Ordian me?”

I was surprised that he’d approached me, but I quickly agreed. Not only could this be a distraction, but if this ship was headed back to Cavenze, I’d need to know at least a little of the region’s language.

Salvador’s word order was strange, but I’d heard from Abby’s nan years ago that it wasn’t unusual for other languages, even those vaguely similar to Ordian, to do strange things like mix the verbs in mid-sentence rather than their proper place at the end. Of course, verbs didn’t always belong at the end of a sentence, but it felt weird to think other languages never did so. Although I suppose that convention itself would be equally unusual to a native Cavenish speaker.

The Cavenish lessons proved to be a valuable distraction and some companionship for the next few days. Salvador was an excellent teacher, which made my sad efforts to help his Ordian all the more a letdown. However, under his tutelage, I made great strides in speaking the language, although there was precious little to read on the ship that wasn’t locked up with Lorelei. Sharing an alphabet certainly helped even if some of the letters made different sounds.

The bubbly mage had reappeared for supper nearly a week into the journey. By this time, between lessons, kitchen work, lack of sleep, and mostly my glamour, I was exhausted. I had a couple ideas for how I might rest to recover mana and stretch my tail, but none for sleep. I moved to where Lorelei was sitting, reviewing notes and eating voraciously.

“Hi Lorelei!” I greeted as cheerfully as I could. “How’s the research been.”

“Oh, Renna,” She swallowed and only glanced up at me. “We uncovered a lot more than I anticipated. We’ll be stopping in Port Princely and contacting our employer. The expedition might be continuing to another potential location in the region.”

“Port Princely? Isn’t that a pirate town?” My heart sank. Port Princely was on an island much like my own (I hadn’t named my island but I refused to honor the name some guy who probably never even spent a day there gave the place) Would the money I had from the wreck pay for another ship? Would I be even be safe? I’d planned to take the Swordfish at least back to the continent, but that was out of the question now.

“Was,” Lorelei yawned. “Was a pirate town. Not so much like the stories anymore.”

“Oh.” My cheeks burned slightly. I had after all gotten my knowledge of the place from stories I heard when I was a child.

Lorelei turned back to read.

I, however, had one more question. “When will we be there?”

“Tomorrow afternoon. Now shoo, I have a report to finalize.” She waved me away and I obliged to go rest my eyes a bit.

That night, tossing and turning, I thought about finally getting a (stationary) bed to sleep in. The more I thought about it, the more I started to think about all the challenges I’d need to face just to get home. Even if I got a ship, would one even go to an Ordian port? Last I checked the Empire wasn’t exactly well-liked in the north.

I tried to calm my negative thoughts. Despite my best efforts, I couldn’t sleep and the hammock was giving me back cramps. Cracking open an eye, I saw Salvador fast asleep in his hammock. Seyari’s was empty. Carefully as I could, I climbed out and ducked through the doorway, headed for the deck.

It was a clear night outside. Aside from the person manning the wheel and a couple people on shift, it was quiet and the water was placid. A waxing gibbous moon hung overhead.

A figure with platinum blond braids leaned against the railing by the prow, looking out over the still water. I knew she wanted to be left alone. I took a spot a distance away, but couldn’t calm my emotions. What if I got home and Tania was gone? What if she was dead? What if the Linthel was destroyed in the civil war? If Tania went somewhere, where would she go? We had grandparents, maybe she went there. Did they survive the war? The enormity of what finding Kartania could turn into raged across my mind and led to even darker thoughts.

What would my sister think of me? I couldn’t just go back and lead a normal life, could I? Would Bourick apprentice a demon? How could I even prove it was me? My human glamour matched a scaled-up version of what my sister probably looked like, but I was dead by all accounts.

I had nowhere to go.

The island had been about survival. I could kick all the feelings down the road. That road just ended. What the hell was I going to do now? I was monster. What if I just had Z’s memories and was a flesh puppet masquerading around? Should I even bother trying to find my sister?

The ocean below me expanded into a black abyss and I was reminded of the void. Was Abby even there? What did she sacrifice? Was it all a lie? My vision clouded.

I tried to get a grip, but failed miserably and slumped forward, staring down. If anyone sees the real me, they’ll run or try to kill me. I can never be happy. Abby, I’m so—

A hand on my shoulder. It was shaking. No, I was shaking.

The hand pulled me back. How did I get so far over the railing? The abyss pulled back from the corners of my vision, but I couldn’t stop thinking.

An arm around me. I turned my head. A face looked at me, blurry and indistinct. Someone was crying. Big, ugly sobs. I didn’t even register that it was me.

I saw green eyes. I could barely make them out through the tears, but they held concern. Empathy.

“A-Abby?” I croaked.

“Renna.” Her voice was different. “Shhhhhh.”

She hugged me. I collapsed into her lap and bawled like a baby. No words came out, just blubbering noises. I don’t know how long we sat there, but eventually the tears stopped. Maybe, just maybe, I could find a path in life.

I turned to those kind eyes again and blinked. Green resolved into gray. I stared wide-eyed at Seyari who was hugging me. Her eyes were misted over and slightly red. She didn’t say a word and just continued to hold me.

Eventually, I managed to stand up. Slowly, Seyari let me go.

I turned to look at her. “Thank you.”

She stared back at me. For a moment her eyes turned cold, searching. Then they softened again. She simply nodded. I stumbled my way back to my hammock. I checked my glamour as best as my addled mind could, and finally slept.

***

When I awoke, both Salvador and Seyari were gone from our room. Their things were packed neatly into a corner. I tried to sit up in the hammock and flopped onto the floor with a thud. I rolled over and laid on the cool wood, staring at the ceiling.

She seemed so much like Abby in those moments. No. Best not compare the two. I wasn’t in my right mind. Seyari, for her own reasons, kept me from going too far. I shouldn’t forget Abby’s sacrifice. I would remember her always, but I needed to understand that she was gone. I could make new friends, maybe more than that someday, but never to try to replace her. I had to value people for their own merits.

I stood up and immediately felt lightheaded. Shit. My glamour was still working, but maintaining it last night must have been a huge drain. Whatever that statue did had to have made it so I wouldn’t drop it so easily. I was an absolute mess; no way was I focusing on it at all. I’d need to recharge soon. Hopefully I could get some private place to stay tonight.

I packed my meagre possessions into a sack I’d gotten from the kitchen. What once held potatoes now held everything I owned: a dagger (I’d left the saber on the island), a spare set of very undersized men’s clothes that I had washed and kept for some inane reason, a pearl, my money in its pouch, and most importantly my spyglass.

I left the sack by my bunkmates’ things and headed up to the deck. Aside from Lorelei, the others were all there. Markus wasn’t even wearing his armor, short-cropped brown hair and moderately pale skin were visible from behind as he watched the approaching island.

We weren’t the only ship in the area either. I could see several others dotted around the sparkling blue waters. I wasn’t familiar with ships in the slightest, but several of them looked drastically different from the Swordfish. Square-like aft sections and sails caught my eyes.

I took a spot away from anyone else and joining in watching us pull into the harbor. Around us, the crew went into a flurry of activity.

Port Princely lined the inside of a narrow-entranced cove. Around the city itself, organized fields of trees and bushes I didn’t recognize rolled up into the hills beyond, disordering into jungle at the fringes of what I could see. The smaller arm of the city looked to be on the seaward side of the bay; a peninsula much larger than my island’s and lacking a certain rock at the terminus. The whole island was significantly larger than mine was, in fact. The mountain behind the city ascended into clouds that seemed to hang off its gently-sloped figure.

Despite being so much further south, the climate was close to the same. Perhaps a bit colder, but I didn’t really notice a difference across the trip so far. Other ships joined us in a line and we pushed through a queue east into the harbor with minimal shouting from the captain and crew.

The buildings of Port Princely were a haphazard mess of styles and quality strewn about with very little organization. Like Linthel, and I presume many other cities, there was a general trend toward wealth and size concentrated in one area, slightly up the hill on the north side, toward the main part of the island. The waterfront seemed to be half held together by the throngs of people going about their business.

We pulled up to a dock and prepared to disembark. I looked out over the crowd, sharp sight picking out details I would never before have expected to see at this distance. With a start, I realized there were a fair few pointed ears showing elven blood. There even seemed to be some beastfolk which I knew little to nothing about.

Non-humans were rare in the Empire, particularly beastfolk. From what I remember, Ordia had poor relations with its neighbors, be they human or otherwise. As a result, while I’d seen and met non-humans in Linthel before, they weren’t a common sight.

I followed Salvador down to our room to grab my things. I wanted to talk to Seyari, but she didn’t join us on the walk down and wasn’t in our room. Salvador had taught me a lot of Cavenish over the past week. I turned out to be a fast learner and while I couldn’t quite hold a conversation, I probably knew enough to get by.

I realized I might not speak the local language and asked Salvador as best I could if they spoke Ordian or Cavenish.

“Cavenish. However, not quite the same as you’re used to.” He said with a small smile.

“Could I understand? Be understood?” My brow furrowed.

He chuckled, “Enough at first. You will learn quickly.”

I silently thanked him for replying in simple words. The more I’d gotten to know him, the more I came to appreciate Salvador for his kindness. Not overt, but affable all the same.

“Do you know an inn? Where could I buy a ship?”

“Buy passage on a ship,” he corrected. “Sadly, I do not know. You may ask Seyari if you are fast.”

“Thanks, Salvador. For all things.” My reply was understood and his face brightened slightly.

“Welcome. Be well.” He waved me off and I ran to try to find Seyari.

I ran back up to the deck with my potato sack. Seyari was walking away from a serious looking Lorelei with a conflicted expression on her face.

“Hey Seyari!” I caught her attention. “Do you know a good inn where I could stay? Also, do you know any place I could purchase passage to Ordia? Salvador said you might know.”

She looked at me briefly and, in the small moment I caught her gray eyes, I saw sadness. I thought about yesterday, but I doubted either of us wanted to bring it up. Besides, I realized, this was probably the last time I’d see her unless we met around Port Princely before either of us left again.

“Yeah. Silver Fog Hotel. It’s a nicer place in uptown, with good views and private rooms.” Her tone was amiable. “Just go up the main road to a big market, take the widest street left and it’s the biggest building a few blocks back.”

“That sounds expensive.”

“If you found old Cavenish silver and gold coins in the wreck like you said, you’ll have more than enough.”

I didn’t recall telling her that, but I easily might have at some point. I briefly wondered if she’d gone through my things. It wasn’t like I really kept them a secret, but why would she have done that? Best not to think that.

“Thanks. A nice bed sounds amazing right now.”

“I’d imagine so. You look exhausted.” She still didn’t meet my gaze. “As for passage? Ask around the harbormaster’s office and they’ll probably have something, though you might have to work.” Seyari pointed to a rather imposing looking dull building at the center of the harbor district.

“Thanks, Seyari.” I beamed my brightest smile at her. I wondered if I should ask what was eating her, but I let it drop.

She gave a sad smile. “You’re welcome. Go get some rest.”

With that, she turned to go belowdecks for her gear. I took my sack, waved to Salvador and the others and walked off the ship into the late afternoon throng.

MadMaxine I have a discord!





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