Chapter 351: Walk to her Home
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"If you're asking me, I don't have a direct answer to that. I can't promise to always be by your side. This is what I told everyone. But believe me when I say that, as much as you want to stay with me, I'm the same. As long as a chance presents itself, I will be with you."
I will never promise something I know I will not be able to fulfill.
Some would say that giving a beautiful lie was always better than telling them the hard truth. However, when it was about me or my girls, I wouldn't go down on that route.
Because if I did, lies would just continue to pile up and it would end up hard to distinguish the truth from that mountain of lies.
In time, those lies would also be the main cause why we're going to drift away from each other.
So, if they couldn't handle entering this relationship with me wherein they would have a lot of rivalries and with me not having enough time to always be there with them, telling them that truth at the start was a lot better than delaying it until it would end up with them regretting their decision.
That's how it should be with Shizu. If she didn't want to, she could just turn me down. And I would've respected it despite me having fallen in love with her. But her choice was unique.
That was also what would happen to my new target. Izumi-senpai's a target that I only chose to target because of how annoyed I was with that guy after all.
The circumstances for my decision to steal her were different from those I stole before my change. Because at least, those who I stole back then were now proven to be girls I like.
Well, that's unless there's someone I forgot which I also stole because of how annoyed I was with their boyfriend.
If I successfully stole her affection away from Ogawa, I would tell her the reason why I decided to steal. Even if it would probably be obvious in the passing of days, frankly telling it to her would be better.
After that, depending on what would be her reaction, I would let her go even if it would end with her hating me.
Well, if I also ended up falling for her then… I would tell her the whole truth about me.
For now, what I was doing to her was only to spite Ogawa, without the true sincerity I was showing Shizu or Arisa-senpai.
I sympathize with her current status, true, but that's just a part of the reason.
Telling her I liked her earlier was somewhat of a lie, it's just a convenient phrase to use if I wanted to sway her mind. The truth in our conversation earlier was how I wanted to steal her affection
Nonetheless, if I ended up truly liking her in the passing of days then… it wouldn't be late to change my approach.
Ah. I got sidetracked.
Shifting my focus back on the girl enclosed by my arm, Chii was currently silent and perhaps contemplating about my answer.
I could feel her warmth as we continued hugging each other. While waiting for her answer, I savored what little time we had to be in this kind of position.
And just like this, with Chii continuing her silence, the train reached the 2nd station.
"Let's go, I'll walk you home."
As if this was my stop, I was the one who guided her out of the train and the station.
"You don't need to formulate an answer about what I said. The purpose of going home with you was to tell you my past and how I changed, right? Then let me continue. But first… tell me which direction is your house."
Well, her answer could wait. And it's not like I was hurrying her to become mine again. But I really need a direction to walk her home.
As if she was awoken from her state of contemplating my words, Chii burst out in laughter as she grabbed on my arm and led me on to walk. "You're totally right, Onoda-chi. You're here for you to tell your story. Continue, I will lead the way."
With the silence out of the way, I continued my story until the point where I remembered how to feel that emotion.
By the time my story ended around 20 minutes later, it's already five minutes since we stood before their house.
"For you to learn the words 'like' and 'love'. And for you to change for the better to take responsibility for your actions, those girls got my admiration. For real."
When I finished my story, Chii or Chizuru, whichever persona was out, opened her mouth and expressed what's inside her.
"Thank you for walking me home, I appreciate it a lot and if I'm being honest, this day, for the new me, is the most exhausting. Knowing how you still feel for me and also knowing that you totally feel bad for saying those words back then. It lifted a lot of weight from my shoulder." She then put herself in front of me and grabbed my other hand. Despite her appearance as a gyaru this time, Chii had a sincere expression on her face.
"I loved and hated you for a long time. Even if I wanted to forget about you, your words became my motivation to continue forward. This is the truth about me. Seeing you at our school at the start of our school year was really a thorough surprise. At first, I only wanted to observe but as time passed, the girls around you changed a lot so I thought you're back to your usual routine."
Since she's someone who experienced being stolen by me, it was really easy for her to observe and pick up the clues. And surely, when she approached me to reveal her identity, it was probably to shake me and make me cautious. Before all that, she was a complete mystery to me.
"I thought you'd be the same old Kii who would be pulling girls to some corner and making out with them. But when I noticed how they all looked at you, I found my previous self on them. Totally in love with the guy whom I should hate. I thought of warning them but I hadn't had the time to do so because you're always with them... In the end, I found out that I was wrong with my assumption. What they were experiencing with you wasn't the same as what I experienced. Because gradually, as days continued to pass, the look in your eyes as you looked at them was totally different from how you looked at me years ago. It began containing emotion that you were incapable of showing back then. And that's one of the reasons I decided to reveal myself to you. To confirm what changed."
I see. What she told me earlier wasn't the entirety of it. And this time, before the day ends for us and after hearing what exactly happened to me.
"What's the other reason?"
There were passers-by looking at us. I was aware of that but at this point and with the dark of the night veiling our faces from afar, there's no reason to mind them.
Besides, I wanted to hear everything from her.
"Because I wanted to rely on you again. To rely on the guy I couldn't forget. Instead of Fukuda and the others, I wanted to be by your side again. I thought I could just bury the hate I felt for you and prevent you from finding out about it. But you pulled it out from its grave... Kii, what should I do?"
Posed with that question, I shook my head as an answer. "I shouldn't be the one dictating your choice. Chii, you're your own person now. Whatever your choice will be, I will respect it. I will not force you into something again. I already did it once. Never again. Now that you know how it will be with me, you have to choose carefully. Naturally, I will not rescind my words about loving you."
"Hmm? Is that you Chizuru? Who is that boy? Why don't you invite him inside?"
Before Chii could answer me, the door to her house opened and a woman in her thirties, who bore resemblance to Chii's appearance years ago, appeared and called out to the girl.
The woman who looked like a typical housewife was wearing a pair of glasses. Judging from how she was squinting while looking at us, she had poor eyesight to see well in the dark.
"Mama? Ah. I'll be coming in soon."
"What coming in? Your younger sister said that the two of you were already there for 10 minutes. If you're going to talk, invite your friend in. Mosquitoes will soon come out of their nests."
"… I'm sorry, Kii. Do you want to come in?"
"Hmm. I guess I shouldn't for now. I only promised to walk you home after all. Take the time to think. Next time I come here, I will not decline the invitation to see your room."
To lighten up the heavy mood that was resulted from how serious our previous conversation was, I uttered a joke.
However, instead of riding on my joke, the girl threw a light jab on my chest.
She took the joke seriously.
"I promise. I will invite you in again if there's a next time."
"Chizuru, it's rude to keep your guest out."
Before she could be fully flustered, her mother's voice rang out again.
With bloated cheeks, the adorable gyaru answered back.
"Mama, he's going home. You can go in now, I'll follow soon."
At this point, we already let go of each other's hand and Chii was already facing her mother.
"See you tomorrow, Chii. Auntie, I appreciate the invitation but it's getting dark. I'll be going." I whispered to the girl first before waving my arm to her mother as I took a step back.
Well, if I continue staying there, I might eventually accept the invitation. Better to retreat for now.
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"If you're asking me, I don't have a direct answer to that. I can't promise to always be by your side. This is what I told everyone. But believe me when I say that, as much as you want to stay with me, I'm the same. As long as a chance presents itself, I will be with you."
I will never promise something I know I will not be able to fulfill.
Some would say that giving a beautiful lie was always better than telling them the hard truth. However, when it was about me or my girls, I wouldn't go down on that route.
Because if I did, lies would just continue to pile up and it would end up hard to distinguish the truth from that mountain of lies.
In time, those lies would also be the main cause why we're going to drift away from each other.
So, if they couldn't handle entering this relationship with me wherein they would have a lot of rivalries and with me not having enough time to always be there with them, telling them that truth at the start was a lot better than delaying it until it would end up with them regretting their decision.
That's how it should be with Shizu. If she didn't want to, she could just turn me down. And I would've respected it despite me having fallen in love with her. But her choice was unique.
That was also what would happen to my new target. Izumi-senpai's a target that I only chose to target because of how annoyed I was with that guy after all.
The circumstances for my decision to steal her were different from those I stole before my change. Because at least, those who I stole back then were now proven to be girls I like.
Well, that's unless there's someone I forgot which I also stole because of how annoyed I was with their boyfriend.
If I successfully stole her affection away from Ogawa, I would tell her the reason why I decided to steal. Even if it would probably be obvious in the passing of days, frankly telling it to her would be better.
After that, depending on what would be her reaction, I would let her go even if it would end with her hating me.
Well, if I also ended up falling for her then… I would tell her the whole truth about me.
For now, what I was doing to her was only to spite Ogawa, without the true sincerity I was showing Shizu or Arisa-senpai.
I sympathize with her current status, true, but that's just a part of the reason.
Telling her I liked her earlier was somewhat of a lie, it's just a convenient phrase to use if I wanted to sway her mind. The truth in our conversation earlier was how I wanted to steal her affection
Nonetheless, if I ended up truly liking her in the passing of days then… it wouldn't be late to change my approach.
Ah. I got sidetracked.
Shifting my focus back on the girl enclosed by my arm, Chii was currently silent and perhaps contemplating about my answer.
I could feel her warmth as we continued hugging each other. While waiting for her answer, I savored what little time we had to be in this kind of position.
And just like this, with Chii continuing her silence, the train reached the 2nd station.
"Let's go, I'll walk you home."
As if this was my stop, I was the one who guided her out of the train and the station.
"You don't need to formulate an answer about what I said. The purpose of going home with you was to tell you my past and how I changed, right? Then let me continue. But first… tell me which direction is your house."
Well, her answer could wait. And it's not like I was hurrying her to become mine again. But I really need a direction to walk her home.
As if she was awoken from her state of contemplating my words, Chii burst out in laughter as she grabbed on my arm and led me on to walk. "You're totally right, Onoda-chi. You're here for you to tell your story. Continue, I will lead the way."
With the silence out of the way, I continued my story until the point where I remembered how to feel that emotion.
By the time my story ended around 20 minutes later, it's already five minutes since we stood before their house.
"For you to learn the words 'like' and 'love'. And for you to change for the better to take responsibility for your actions, those girls got my admiration. For real."
When I finished my story, Chii or Chizuru, whichever persona was out, opened her mouth and expressed what's inside her.
"Thank you for walking me home, I appreciate it a lot and if I'm being honest, this day, for the new me, is the most exhausting. Knowing how you still feel for me and also knowing that you totally feel bad for saying those words back then. It lifted a lot of weight from my shoulder." She then put herself in front of me and grabbed my other hand. Despite her appearance as a gyaru this time, Chii had a sincere expression on her face.
"I loved and hated you for a long time. Even if I wanted to forget about you, your words became my motivation to continue forward. This is the truth about me. Seeing you at our school at the start of our school year was really a thorough surprise. At first, I only wanted to observe but as time passed, the girls around you changed a lot so I thought you're back to your usual routine."
Since she's someone who experienced being stolen by me, it was really easy for her to observe and pick up the clues. And surely, when she approached me to reveal her identity, it was probably to shake me and make me cautious. Before all that, she was a complete mystery to me.
"I thought you'd be the same old Kii who would be pulling girls to some corner and making out with them. But when I noticed how they all looked at you, I found my previous self on them. Totally in love with the guy whom I should hate. I thought of warning them but I hadn't had the time to do so because you're always with them... In the end, I found out that I was wrong with my assumption. What they were experiencing with you wasn't the same as what I experienced. Because gradually, as days continued to pass, the look in your eyes as you looked at them was totally different from how you looked at me years ago. It began containing emotion that you were incapable of showing back then. And that's one of the reasons I decided to reveal myself to you. To confirm what changed."
I see. What she told me earlier wasn't the entirety of it. And this time, before the day ends for us and after hearing what exactly happened to me.
"What's the other reason?"
There were passers-by looking at us. I was aware of that but at this point and with the dark of the night veiling our faces from afar, there's no reason to mind them.
Besides, I wanted to hear everything from her.
"Because I wanted to rely on you again. To rely on the guy I couldn't forget. Instead of Fukuda and the others, I wanted to be by your side again. I thought I could just bury the hate I felt for you and prevent you from finding out about it. But you pulled it out from its grave... Kii, what should I do?"
Posed with that question, I shook my head as an answer. "I shouldn't be the one dictating your choice. Chii, you're your own person now. Whatever your choice will be, I will respect it. I will not force you into something again. I already did it once. Never again. Now that you know how it will be with me, you have to choose carefully. Naturally, I will not rescind my words about loving you."
"Hmm? Is that you Chizuru? Who is that boy? Why don't you invite him inside?"
Before Chii could answer me, the door to her house opened and a woman in her thirties, who bore resemblance to Chii's appearance years ago, appeared and called out to the girl.
The woman who looked like a typical housewife was wearing a pair of glasses. Judging from how she was squinting while looking at us, she had poor eyesight to see well in the dark.
"Mama? Ah. I'll be coming in soon."
"What coming in? Your younger sister said that the two of you were already there for 10 minutes. If you're going to talk, invite your friend in. Mosquitoes will soon come out of their nests."
"… I'm sorry, Kii. Do you want to come in?"
"Hmm. I guess I shouldn't for now. I only promised to walk you home after all. Take the time to think. Next time I come here, I will not decline the invitation to see your room."
To lighten up the heavy mood that was resulted from how serious our previous conversation was, I uttered a joke.
However, instead of riding on my joke, the girl threw a light jab on my chest.
She took the joke seriously.
"I promise. I will invite you in again if there's a next time."
"Chizuru, it's rude to keep your guest out."
Before she could be fully flustered, her mother's voice rang out again.
With bloated cheeks, the adorable gyaru answered back.
"Mama, he's going home. You can go in now, I'll follow soon."
At this point, we already let go of each other's hand and Chii was already facing her mother.
"See you tomorrow, Chii. Auntie, I appreciate the invitation but it's getting dark. I'll be going." I whispered to the girl first before waving my arm to her mother as I took a step back.
Well, if I continue staying there, I might eventually accept the invitation. Better to retreat for now.
"If you're asking me, I don't have a direct answer to that. I can't promise to always be by your side. This is what I told everyone. But believe me when I say that, as much as you want to stay with me, I'm the same. As long as a chance presents itself, I will be with you." I will never promise something I know I will not be able to fulfill. Some would say that giving a beautiful lie was always better than telling them the hard truth. However, when it was about me or my girls, I wouldn't go down on that route. Because if I did, lies would just continue to pile up and it would end up hard to distinguish the truth from that mountain of lies. In time, those lies would also be the main cause why we're going to drift away from each other. So, if they couldn't handle entering this relationship with me wherein they would have a lot of rivalries and with me not having enough time to always be there with them, telling them that truth at the start was a lot better than delaying it until it would end up with them regretting their decision. That's how it should be with Shizu. If she didn't want to, she could just turn me down. And I would've respected it despite me having fallen in love with her. But her choice was unique. That was also what would happen to my new target. Izumi-senpai's a target that I only chose to target because of how annoyed I was with that guy after all. The circumstances for my decision to steal her were different from those I stole before my change. Because at least, those who I stole back then were now proven to be girls I like. Well, that's unless there's someone I forgot which I also stole because of how annoyed I was with their boyfriend. If I successfully stole her affection away from Ogawa, I would tell her the reason why I decided to steal. Even if it would probably be obvious in the passing of days, frankly telling it to her would be better. After that, depending on what would be her reaction, I would let her go even if it would end with her hating me. Well, if I also ended up falling for her then I would tell her the whole truth about me. For now, what I was doing to her was only to spite Ogawa, without the true sincerity I was showing Shizu or Arisa-senpai. I sympathize with her current status, true, but that's just a part of the reason. Telling her I liked her earlier was somewhat of a lie, it's just a convenient phrase to use if I wanted to sway her mind. The truth in our conversation earlier was how I wanted to steal her affection Nonetheless, if I ended up truly liking her in the passing of days then it wouldn't be late to change my approach. Ah. I got sidetracked. Shifting my focus back on the girl enclosed by my arm, Chii was currently silent and perhaps contemplating about my answer. I could feel her warmth as we continued hugging each other. While waiting for her answer, I savored what little time we had to be in this kind of position. And just like this, with Chii continuing her silence, the train reached the 2nd station. "Let's go, I'll walk you home." As if this was my stop, I was the one who guided her out of the train and the station. "You don't need to formulate an answer about what I said. The purpose of going home with you was to tell you my past and how I changed, right? Then let me continue. But first tell me which direction is your house." Well, her answer could wait. And it's not like I was hurrying her to become mine again. But I really need a direction to walk her home. As if she was awoken from her state of contemplating my words, Chii burst out in laughter as she grabbed on my arm and led me on to walk. "You're totally right, Onoda-chi. You're here for you to tell your story. Continue, I will lead the way." With the silence out of the way, I continued my story until the point where I remembered how to feel that emotion. By the time my story ended around 20 minutes later, it's already five minutes since we stood before their house. "For you to learn the words 'like' and 'love'. And for you to change for the better to take responsibility for your actions, those girls got my admiration. For real." When I finished my story, Chii or Chizuru, whichever persona was out, opened her mouth and expressed what's inside her. "Thank you for walking me home, I appreciate it a lot and if I'm being honest, this day, for the new me, is the most exhausting. Knowing how you still feel for me and also knowing that you totally feel bad for saying those words back then. It lifted a lot of weight from my shoulder." She then put herself in front of me and grabbed my other hand. Despite her appearance as a gyaru this time, Chii had a sincere expression on her face. "I loved and hated you for a long time. Even if I wanted to forget about you, your words became my motivation to continue forward. This is the truth about me. Seeing you at our school at the start of our school year was really a thorough surprise. At first, I only wanted to observe but as time passed, the girls around you changed a lot so I thought you're back to your usual routine." Since she's someone who experienced being stolen by me, it was really easy for her to observe and pick up the clues. And surely, when she approached me to reveal her identity, it was probably to shake me and make me cautious. Before all that, she was a complete mystery to me. "I thought you'd be the same old Kii who would be pulling girls to some corner and making out with them. But when I noticed how they all looked at you, I found my previous self on them. Totally in love with the guy whom I should hate. I thought of warning them but I hadn't had the time to do so because you're always with them... In the end, I found out that I was wrong with my assumption. What they were experiencing with you wasn't the same as what I experienced. Because gradually, as days continued to pass, the look in your eyes as you looked at them was totally different from how you looked at me years ago. It began containing emotion that you were incapable of showing back then. And that's one of the reasons I decided to reveal myself to you. To confirm what changed." I see. What she told me earlier wasn't the entirety of it. And this time, before the day ends for us and after hearing what exactly happened to me. "What's the other reason?" There were passers-by looking at us. I was aware of that but at this point and with the dark of the night veiling our faces from afar, there's no reason to mind them. Besides, I wanted to hear everything from her. "Because I wanted to rely on you again. To rely on the guy I couldn't forget. Instead of Fukuda and the others, I wanted to be by your side again. I thought I could just bury the hate I felt for you and prevent you from finding out about it. But you pulled it out from its grave... Kii, what should I do?" Posed with that question, I shook my head as an answer. "I shouldn't be the one dictating your choice. Chii, you're your own person now. Whatever your choice will be, I will respect it. I will not force you into something again. I already did it once. Never again. Now that you know how it will be with me, you have to choose carefully. Naturally, I will not rescind my words about loving you." "Hmm? Is that you Chizuru? Who is that boy? Why don't you invite him inside?" Before Chii could answer me, the door to her house opened and a woman in her thirties, who bore resemblance to Chii's appearance years ago, appeared and called out to the girl. The woman who looked like a typical housewife was wearing a pair of glasses. Judging from how she was squinting while looking at us, she had poor eyesight to see well in the dark. "Mama? Ah. I'll be coming in soon." "What coming in? Your younger sister said that the two of you were already there for 10 minutes. If you're going to talk, invite your friend in. Mosquitoes will soon come out of their nests." " I'm sorry, Kii. Do you want to come in?" "Hmm. I guess I shouldn't for now. I only promised to walk you home after all. Take the time to think. Next time I come here, I will not decline the invitation to see your room." To lighten up the heavy mood that was resulted from how serious our previous conversation was, I uttered a joke. However, instead of riding on my joke, the girl threw a light jab on my chest. She took the joke seriously. "I promise. I will invite you in again if there's a next time." "Chizuru, it's rude to keep your guest out." Before she could be fully flustered, her mother's voice rang out again. With bloated cheeks, the adorable gyaru answered back. "Mama, he's going home. You can go in now, I'll follow soon." At this point, we already let go of each other's hand and Chii was already facing her mother. "See you tomorrow, Chii. Auntie, I appreciate the invitation but it's getting dark. I'll be going." I whispered to the girl first before waving my arm to her mother as I took a step back. Well, if I continue staying there, I might eventually accept the invitation. Better to retreat for now.
