[2009 – September]
Pulling out a small booklet from the inner pocket of my coat, my fingers brushing softly over the leather cover, I turned toward the Ancient One again.
Her gaze flickered down to the small leather-bound book in my hands, the look inside her eyes still unreadable as she spoke up.
“It seems that my gift was well received by you.”, she said calmly.
I didn't try to deny what she said, as my fondness for the small booklet was way beyond simple enjoyment of what was written inside.
Some books were like this, their words piercing into one's heart and fundamentally changing one's perception and ideals after reading them a single time. Of course, this depended not on the contents of the book but more on who it was that read it.
The same line might be able to inspire one person while having no effect on another. At the same time, some texts might resonate with someone's innermost feelings and dreams in a way that no other texts could.
I still remembered that in my last life, I had come across such a situation in my teenage years too.
It was during a time when my emotions and perception were not yet mature and I had just started to look for meaning and purpose in my life, especially for directions about my future. It was a time when I had felt the most lost as I had not yet understood myself well enough to know which path I needed to take to feel a sense of fulfillment in my life.
It had been at that time that I had come across a very special book that changed the way I looked at the world forever. It had been as if a fire had been lit in my heart that had burnt away all falsehood and, in a way, had brought clarity to my mind for the first time.
It had been a difficult time too, as I had lost interest in meaninglessly pursuing wealth and pleasure at a very young age, instead, I had started to look for something more in life, something that seemed meaningful and lasting.
This had led me to feel isolated from my peers as none of them seemed to look at the world the same way that I had, and at the same time, I myself had no longer been able to ignore the sense of distance and aversion that I had felt for mindlessly pursuing wealth and debauchery.
Eventually, this had also been the reason that I started to fall into depression more and more often as time passed, as I had been unable to pursue what my heart yearned for due to the invisible shackles that society had trapped me in.
Still, no matter how painful and depressing those times had been, I had always looked back fondly at the book that had so drastically changed the way in which I looked at the world. I had never regretted reading it, even when I had felt the most lonely and in pain.
I hadn't blamed the words that had undoubtedly started me on this path, even though this kind of spiritual awakening had undoubtedly brought me unimaginable suffering.
The sheer sense of desolation and loneliness, even now, thinking back to those times I felt my heart tremble and ache.
And yet, I had been nothing but thankful and cherished the words that had changed my life so greatly. Even now, so many years later when I could hardly remember those words anymore, my feelings for that particular book had not changed.
It might seem strange but I was thankful for the fact that I had been given the opportunity to pursue something that felt truly worthwhile, instead of spending my life acting like a mindless drone. Naturally, this added to my desire to pursue strength in a bid to be truly free in this life.
'The Cycle' was similar as it had spoken to me in a way other texts just didn't, as it had given me a deeper understanding of the path that I wanted to take and also the world around me.
Still, this inevitably came with a curiosity for who had written it, seeing as the author had not been mentioned at all in the booklet.
From the content alone, I knew that no ordinary individual could have possibly written this book, the sheer wisdom and insight contained in those few pages were something that I was sure would have me pondering and thinking about it even many many years from now.
“Who wrote this?”, I asked the Ancient One directly, seeing no reason to beat around the bush as this should not have been a difficult question to answer.
Surprisingly enough though, her reply was different than I had imagined it would be.
Shaking her head, the Ancient One stated calmly: "I know you have many questions about 'The Cycle' but those are not something I can answer. Since you have read it and understand how special it is – maybe even more than I do. You should understand it when I tell you that some answers are best never found."
Locking eyes with her for a few moments, I looked at the Ancient One deeply before sighing and giving up.
I may be curious about the origins of the book but I was not blind to the hints of warning contained in the Ancient One's words.
She wasn't threatening me but rather telling me that nothing good would come of knowing too much in this case. I wasn't sure what kind of danger it was that she seemed apprehensive about, but only an idiot would ignore her advice.
Still, knowing that she had read 'The Cycle' too, I seemed to understand something as I recalled knowledge about her future.
"It's Strange, isn't it? You have been waiting for him all this time so that your 'cycle' could come to an end.", I asked quietly as I looked at the Sorcerer Supreme with deep eyes.
Smiling lightly, the Ancient One nodded peacefully as she replied: “Kamar-Taj needs someone powerful enough to guard this reality, and he is the most qualified.”
Frowning lightly, I sighed inaudibly, hesitating to speak my mind.
Strange was no doubt an incredibly powerful sorcerer, or at least had the potential to be one, and therefore fulfilled the necessary requirements to replace the Ancient One, but in my opinion, he was not a qualified Sorcerer Supreme.
Unlike her, who truly only acted to defend this world as a whole, Strange lacked the Ancient One's vision and foresight. After all, being able to use the Eye of Agamotto didn't mean that one was wise enough to choose the correct path.
Not to mention that Strange's own arrogance was a dangerous trait that would threaten this reality due to his carelessness.
Still, I knew that even without me saying anything, the Ancient One was most certainly aware of these things.
It was just that she had grown weary of life and she had been anticipating the day that she would be freed from her position and could pass on in peace for far too long, knowing that Strange would be able to take up her mantle, even if he barely qualified to do so.
Looking her in the eyes, I could see hints of the exhaustion and pain beneath the serene surface that she had endured for god-knows-how-long for the protection of the Earth in her position as Sorcerer Supreme.
I had no right to speak up and try to persuade her to not leave a reckless fellow like Strange in charge, and neither did anyone else.
Not to mention that I did not really want to interfere in such matters but the Ancient One deserved to find her peace probably more than anyone else on this god-forsaken planet.
This also made me aware of the fact that she most likely planned to allow Strange to cash in the favours that I owed her as a form of insurance in case he messed up, which I know that he would do at some point.
So, in the end, I just kept quiet and drank the tea that she had brewed, looking at the bustling streets of Kathmandu with the Ancient One and Arya by my side.
[2009 – September]
Pulling out a small booklet from the inner pocket of my coat, my fingers brushing softly over the leather cover, I turned toward the Ancient One again.
Her gaze flickered down to the small leather-bound book in my hands, the look inside her eyes still unreadable as she spoke up.
“It seems that my gift was well received by you.”, she said calmly.
I didn't try to deny what she said, as my fondness for the small booklet was way beyond simple enjoyment of what was written inside.
Some books were like this, their words piercing into one's heart and fundamentally changing one's perception and ideals after reading them a single time. Of course, this depended not on the contents of the book but more on who it was that read it.
The same line might be able to inspire one person while having no effect on another. At the same time, some texts might resonate with someone's innermost feelings and dreams in a way that no other texts could.
I still remembered that in my last life, I had come across such a situation in my teenage years too.
It was during a time when my emotions and perception were not yet mature and I had just started to look for meaning and purpose in my life, especially for directions about my future. It was a time when I had felt the most lost as I had not yet understood myself well enough to know which path I needed to take to feel a sense of fulfillment in my life.
It had been at that time that I had come across a very special book that changed the way I looked at the world forever. It had been as if a fire had been lit in my heart that had burnt away all falsehood and, in a way, had brought clarity to my mind for the first time.
It had been a difficult time too, as I had lost interest in meaninglessly pursuing wealth and pleasure at a very young age, instead, I had started to look for something more in life, something that seemed meaningful and lasting.
This had led me to feel isolated from my peers as none of them seemed to look at the world the same way that I had, and at the same time, I myself had no longer been able to ignore the sense of distance and aversion that I had felt for mindlessly pursuing wealth and debauchery.
Eventually, this had also been the reason that I started to fall into depression more and more often as time passed, as I had been unable to pursue what my heart yearned for due to the invisible shackles that society had trapped me in.
Still, no matter how painful and depressing those times had been, I had always looked back fondly at the book that had so drastically changed the way in which I looked at the world. I had never regretted reading it, even when I had felt the most lonely and in pain.
I hadn't blamed the words that had undoubtedly started me on this path, even though this kind of spiritual awakening had undoubtedly brought me unimaginable suffering.
The sheer sense of desolation and loneliness, even now, thinking back to those times I felt my heart tremble and ache.
And yet, I had been nothing but thankful and cherished the words that had changed my life so greatly. Even now, so many years later when I could hardly remember those words anymore, my feelings for that particular book had not changed.
It might seem strange but I was thankful for the fact that I had been given the opportunity to pursue something that felt truly worthwhile, instead of spending my life acting like a mindless drone. Naturally, this added to my desire to pursue strength in a bid to be truly free in this life.
'The Cycle' was similar as it had spoken to me in a way other texts just didn't, as it had given me a deeper understanding of the path that I wanted to take and also the world around me.
Still, this inevitably came with a curiosity for who had written it, seeing as the author had not been mentioned at all in the booklet.
From the content alone, I knew that no ordinary individual could have possibly written this book, the sheer wisdom and insight contained in those few pages were something that I was sure would have me pondering and thinking about it even many many years from now.
“Who wrote this?”, I asked the Ancient One directly, seeing no reason to beat around the bush as this should not have been a difficult question to answer.
Surprisingly enough though, her reply was different than I had imagined it would be.
Shaking her head, the Ancient One stated calmly: "I know you have many questions about 'The Cycle' but those are not something I can answer. Since you have read it and understand how special it is – maybe even more than I do. You should understand it when I tell you that some answers are best never found."
Locking eyes with her for a few moments, I looked at the Ancient One deeply before sighing and giving up.
I may be curious about the origins of the book but I was not blind to the hints of warning contained in the Ancient One's words.
She wasn't threatening me but rather telling me that nothing good would come of knowing too much in this case. I wasn't sure what kind of danger it was that she seemed apprehensive about, but only an idiot would ignore her advice.
Still, knowing that she had read 'The Cycle' too, I seemed to understand something as I recalled knowledge about her future.
"It's Strange, isn't it? You have been waiting for him all this time so that your 'cycle' could come to an end.", I asked quietly as I looked at the Sorcerer Supreme with deep eyes.
Smiling lightly, the Ancient One nodded peacefully as she replied: “Kamar-Taj needs someone powerful enough to guard this reality, and he is the most qualified.”
Frowning lightly, I sighed inaudibly, hesitating to speak my mind.
Strange was no doubt an incredibly powerful sorcerer, or at least had the potential to be one, and therefore fulfilled the necessary requirements to replace the Ancient One, but in my opinion, he was not a qualified Sorcerer Supreme.
Unlike her, who truly only acted to defend this world as a whole, Strange lacked the Ancient One's vision and foresight. After all, being able to use the Eye of Agamotto didn't mean that one was wise enough to choose the correct path.
Not to mention that Strange's own arrogance was a dangerous trait that would threaten this reality due to his carelessness.
Still, I knew that even without me saying anything, the Ancient One was most certainly aware of these things.
It was just that she had grown weary of life and she had been anticipating the day that she would be freed from her position and could pass on in peace for far too long, knowing that Strange would be able to take up her mantle, even if he barely qualified to do so.
Looking her in the eyes, I could see hints of the exhaustion and pain beneath the serene surface that she had endured for god-knows-how-long for the protection of the Earth in her position as Sorcerer Supreme.
I had no right to speak up and try to persuade her to not leave a reckless fellow like Strange in charge, and neither did anyone else.
Not to mention that I did not really want to interfere in such matters but the Ancient One deserved to find her peace probably more than anyone else on this god-forsaken planet.
This also made me aware of the fact that she most likely planned to allow Strange to cash in the favours that I owed her as a form of insurance in case he messed up, which I know that he would do at some point.
So, in the end, I just kept quiet and drank the tea that she had brewed, looking at the bustling streets of Kathmandu with the Ancient One and Arya by my side.
