An existence so vast that mortal mind could never comprehend its extent was paying close attention to Wolf. It had been passively observing him for years, but these last couple of days disturbed her-him greatly. The entity was pinning a lot of her-his hopes on the growth of this tiny wisp, yet Wolf’s mind was strained to the point of snapping.
“SIGH. I REALLY DIDN’T WANT TO GET INVOLVED BEFORE HE WAS READY TO LEAVE. THAT SPITEFUL LITTLE CREATURE ENDED UP RUINING EVERYTHING.”
The entity felt despondent as she-he turned her-his gaze towards the distant stars, as if seeking forgiveness, or maybe understanding. She-he received it and nodded in gratitude.
She-he really hated having her-his hand forced. The fact that the matter was so trivial only made the whole affair even more frustrating. She-he didn’t wish to get involved with the matters of this world. Not because taking action was difficult, but because she-he felt obliged to behave respectfully.
“I GUESS IT CAN’T BE HELPED.”
***
Wolf was running away from the Silverhound camp for half a night now. Thanks to the Star Body Body Refining art, Wolf still had energy left. Even though it was deprived of Internal Energy, malnourished and abused, his body was still full of endurance and vitality.
The boy ran as fast as he could. He wanted to leave that camp far behind. He feared that he would turn around and start killing those people to vent his anger, even though he knew that none of this was their fault.
The entity that observed him closely was relieved to see this. That meant that wisp’s mind and morality weren’t completely gone. The situation was difficult, but still salvageable.
“CHILD.” an entrancing female voice shook the world.
It wasn’t loud, it was boundless. It had a quality that seemed able to disperse everything before it, world included, as if it was a billowing wind scattering dense fog, or a piercing sound rousing a person from deep sleep. And that voice was entirely focused on Wolf.
The boy was completely shaken out of his dazed state. In fact he felt as if his soul fought tooth and nail just to remain in his body. A single benevolent word of this divine voice was almost enough to extinguish his life.
“Pardon,” the charming, feminine voice seemed somewhat embarrassed by what had happened. It changed, losing some of its divinity.
“Child,” She-he began again, “you seem to be going through a rough time. If you wish, I can lend you an ear. They say that speaking your troubles lightens your burden.”
Wolf looked left and right. The night was still dark and the owner of this beautiful voice could not be seen. It took a moment for him to realize that his eyes, which could see in any darkness as well as they could in broad daylight, seemed to have gone blind.
No, he wasn’t blind. Wolf realized with a frown. He could just barely see the outline of his hands. In the distance he could see the normal terrain, but the area he was in was devoid of light. It was as if the moon and stars shied away, fearing to enter this domain.
“Please speak,” the melodious voice filled the darkness. “It will be good for your soul. No matter what you say I promise not to judge you, and I will be here to hear out anything you have to say.”
Wolf wasn’t sure why, but he felt several things about this voice.
For one, it felt incredibly vast. He felt like he was listening to the words of a god. Also, he could tell that the person speaking was worried about him and sincerely wished to aid him.
“I,” he started. “I am alone. There is nobody left…”
Wolf fumbled for words. However, once he started they kept flowing out like an unending river.
The boy rambled about how his mother had died ages ago. About how only his father existed in his life, but now, his father was gone too. In fact the only things he had left were his father’s belongings and a letter, which he promised not to read until he became a True-Namer.
The feminine voice didn’t say a word. As she-he listened, a solid puff of warm air gently stroked Wolf’s hair, evoking a feeling of safety and intimacy.
Warmth, safety, familiarity… All of these were the things Wolf’s broken mind desperately longed for. He didn’t notice that he was wretchedly sobbing, nor that his throat tightened as he spoke of his pain. He didn’t notice that he had balled his fists and gnashed his teeth as he spoke about his hatred.
This tiny, flickering wisp of existence, which barely had the right to even be called an entity, cursed the world and the gods as it spoke with the unimaginably large existence that listened patiently.
The vast ocean listened to the lamentations of a tiny drop. Its problems sounded beyond trivial. Its rage barely a spark before the suppressed volcano, yet the ocean patiently listened to the drop, all the while consoling through fabricated touch, scent and warmth. This lasted until finally Wolf ran out of steam and his telling ended.
When Wolf finally went silent, the feminine voice spoke softly.
“Poor little thing. Going through so much suffering,” she-he said then paused for a moment.
“Thank you for sharing. In turn I will tell you my own story. I will keep it short and simple, since telling the whole thing would take far too long–” she-he held back from finishing her-his sentence with for a wisp such as yourself.
“In the distant past Parent and her-his kin helped a group of strangers. They took them in and nourished them. Yet as soon as they turned their backs to these traitorous vipers, they were attacked. Parent and her-his kin were mighty, but they lived far apart and their enemies outnumbered them. To make matters worse, apparently one of their number sold them out and helped the attackers in a bid to preserve its own existence.
“I personally witnessed what happened to Parent. She-he was sneak attacked, instantly getting wounded by those dogs. The wound wasn’t too serious, but no matter how light, it was still a wound. Eldest sister-brother in her-his moment of outrage stepped forth to defend Parent. Only to be instantly exterminated. To those that could wound Parent we were no more than specks of dust. Snacks at most.
“With my current wisdom and knowledge, I realize that those actions were empty bravado. Yet I understand how Eldest thought and why she-he did what she-he did, and I don’t think she-he was wrong. However, at that time I was utterly shocked. My eldest sister-brother, the mightiest of us, died without being able to put up resistance. In a conflict of that level she-he was no different from a child stumbling around blindly, looking for death. The only thing Eldest managed to achieve was to further distract Parent and quicken her-his demise.
“At that moment Parent shouted for us to leave. My elder sister-brother vanished as soon as Parent shouted, shocking me even further. Old Two was not the strongest of us, but she-he was the wisest by far.
“Myself and my younger sister-brother were stunned by what had happened. Our elder sister-brother abandoned us and Parent without batting an eye. But then our enemies turned away from Parent, and they attacked the two of us with all their might.
“I still shudder when I remember that raging surge of energy crashing down towards me. If not for Parent’s intervention, Old Four and I would have perished in body and soul. I don’t even know if Uncle would have been able to restore us,” she-he said while doubting a senior’s ability. “But Parent did intervene. She-he moved faster than light and blocked those blows with her-his own body.
“It was only then that we realized why Old Two had done what she-he did. Parent’s heavy wounds snapped us back to reality, and we started fleeing with everything we had. Among the four of us, Eldest was the strongest, while Old Two was the quickest of wit. Compared with them, Old Four and I were sorely lacking. It was due to the weakness of our bodies and minds that Parent was gravely wounded and ultimately perished. Yet Parent still looked at us with benevolent eyes as she-he urged us to flee with her-his gaze.
“So we did the only thing we could. We fled. And yet, even with such a trivial task before us we acted incompetently. In our panic, Old Four and I separated, not paying attention to where the other was going. I ended up wandering until I came across a place where I was given shelter.
“I don’t have information on what happened with the others. I know that everyone, save for the traitor and the one that is untouchable, is now gone. I’m guessing that the rest did as Parent and desperately struggled in order to buy time for their children and servants to flee.
“But, that is beside the point. What I’m trying to get across is that I too have gone through the same phases of hatred and self loathing you are going through now. I was looking for a villain I could blame, for something or someone I could vent on. However, that is not fair. I clearly know who the villains are, yet in my powerlessness I tried to harm myself and others in order to make myself feel better.
“You should never do this. Fortunately, I was saved. I found those that needed help and I aided them, hoping that one day the karma I sowed would bear fruit. I wish the same for our attackers. We were kind, and yet we got such cruelty in return. I wish for a harbinger of karma to visit them, and I know that one day it will happen. Even though my previous attempts didn’t bear fruit, all I have to do is stay alive long enough. But that’s not important now.
“I wish to share with you the cure that healed me to an extent–” The gentle voice abruptly halted.
The entity’s mind was suddenly assailed by telepathic shouts.
What are you doing!? You’re no more than a guest here! A pathetic refugee! Don’t meddle!
Look! You’re calming him down! We need his rage! His passion! His hatred!
NO! The entity explored in rage.
I AM THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE DEMANDING AN EXPLANATION! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING YOU IMPOTENT MANIAC!
YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AN OBSERVER!
YOU REFINED THE SOUL OF THE CANDIDATE’S FATHER AND IMPRINTED IT INTO HIS MIND! ARE YOU INSANE!?
YOU ALMOST SHATTERED THIS WISP’S MIND COMPLETELY, AND I DO NOT MEAN JUST EMOTIONALLY!
WHAT YOU HAVE DONE IS DIRECTLY AGAINST YOUR MASTER’S ORDERS!
REMEMBER YOUR PLACE SERVANT!
EVEN THOUGH I AM NO MORE THAN A GUEST YOU SHOULD MIND OUR SENIORITY! EVEN YOUR MAKER WOULD’VE ADDRESSED ME AS SENIOR IF IT STILL EXISTED!
The first voice calmed down and sent its thoughts in a flat monotone voice.
Don’t use that voice with me. I’m still acting civil. Everything I do I do for Master.
The feminine voice also seemed to take a step back.
This is the seventh candidate in eleven billion years. She-he sent. Eleven billion years! And barely half of them managed to fulfill the criteria in the end. I cannot let you break him with such a stupid stunt.
This exchange happened so rapidly that the voice barely faltered before it continued her-his conversation with Wolf.
“– In fact I will do even more than that,” the feminine voice continued. “I have a creature with me. It is completely helpless with no next of kin. It is all alone in the world, just like yourself. Take care of it and one day it will serve you well. It will love you like a brother and respect you like a father.”
With those words a silver egg, big enough to fit a large cat, appeared in front of Wolf.
The boy gingerly reached out to touch it.
Warm. Under Wolf’s fingers the egg felt wonderfully warm. A moment later he felt a faint heartbeat. He didn’t know why, but Wolf could feel the purity and innocence of the creature sleeping inside the egg and unwittingly smiled.
What do you think you are doing? That thing can’t hatch here! Who’s going to feed it? The monotone voice lost a bit of its monotone nature.
The owner of the feminine voice snorted in her mind. She was furious with the way things were developing. The silver lining was that the wisp in front of her immediately felt kinship with her-his offspring.
I would not have been forced to do this if not for your meddling, she-he barely held back her-his rage. I will provide all of the food for this child, so you do not have to worry about the energy required to raise her-him.
You better, your kind eats a ton. The other party grumbled, but seemed to come to terms with the situation.
Author’s note:
The family members of the feminine voice have both sexes, thus both genders in everything. At some point one of the feminine voice’s elders was labeled as an IT, meaning it has no biological sex. Times being are what they are, I’m afraid of inventing new pronouns, as it might get me shot, so we’ll be going forward this anatomically correct, albeit dumb naming convention.
An existence so vast that mortal mind could never comprehend its extent was paying close attention to Wolf. It had been passively observing him for years, but these last couple of days disturbed her-him greatly. The entity was pinning a lot of her-his hopes on the growth of this tiny wisp, yet Wolf’s mind was strained to the point of snapping.
“SIGH. I REALLY DIDN’T WANT TO GET INVOLVED BEFORE HE WAS READY TO LEAVE. THAT SPITEFUL LITTLE CREATURE ENDED UP RUINING EVERYTHING.”
The entity felt despondent as she-he turned her-his gaze towards the distant stars, as if seeking forgiveness, or maybe understanding. She-he received it and nodded in gratitude.
She-he really hated having her-his hand forced. The fact that the matter was so trivial only made the whole affair even more frustrating. She-he didn’t wish to get involved with the matters of this world. Not because taking action was difficult, but because she-he felt obliged to behave respectfully.
“I GUESS IT CAN’T BE HELPED.”
***
Wolf was running away from the Silverhound camp for half a night now. Thanks to the Star Body Body Refining art, Wolf still had energy left. Even though it was deprived of Internal Energy, malnourished and abused, his body was still full of endurance and vitality.
The boy ran as fast as he could. He wanted to leave that camp far behind. He feared that he would turn around and start killing those people to vent his anger, even though he knew that none of this was their fault.
The entity that observed him closely was relieved to see this. That meant that wisp’s mind and morality weren’t completely gone. The situation was difficult, but still salvageable.
“CHILD.” an entrancing female voice shook the world.
It wasn’t loud, it was boundless. It had a quality that seemed able to disperse everything before it, world included, as if it was a billowing wind scattering dense fog, or a piercing sound rousing a person from deep sleep. And that voice was entirely focused on Wolf.
The boy was completely shaken out of his dazed state. In fact he felt as if his soul fought tooth and nail just to remain in his body. A single benevolent word of this divine voice was almost enough to extinguish his life.
“Pardon,” the charming, feminine voice seemed somewhat embarrassed by what had happened. It changed, losing some of its divinity.
“Child,” She-he began again, “you seem to be going through a rough time. If you wish, I can lend you an ear. They say that speaking your troubles lightens your burden.”
Wolf looked left and right. The night was still dark and the owner of this beautiful voice could not be seen. It took a moment for him to realize that his eyes, which could see in any darkness as well as they could in broad daylight, seemed to have gone blind.
No, he wasn’t blind. Wolf realized with a frown. He could just barely see the outline of his hands. In the distance he could see the normal terrain, but the area he was in was devoid of light. It was as if the moon and stars shied away, fearing to enter this domain.
“Please speak,” the melodious voice filled the darkness. “It will be good for your soul. No matter what you say I promise not to judge you, and I will be here to hear out anything you have to say.”
Wolf wasn’t sure why, but he felt several things about this voice.
For one, it felt incredibly vast. He felt like he was listening to the words of a god. Also, he could tell that the person speaking was worried about him and sincerely wished to aid him.
“I,” he started. “I am alone. There is nobody left…”
Wolf fumbled for words. However, once he started they kept flowing out like an unending river.
The boy rambled about how his mother had died ages ago. About how only his father existed in his life, but now, his father was gone too. In fact the only things he had left were his father’s belongings and a letter, which he promised not to read until he became a True-Namer.
The feminine voice didn’t say a word. As she-he listened, a solid puff of warm air gently stroked Wolf’s hair, evoking a feeling of safety and intimacy.
Warmth, safety, familiarity… All of these were the things Wolf’s broken mind desperately longed for. He didn’t notice that he was wretchedly sobbing, nor that his throat tightened as he spoke of his pain. He didn’t notice that he had balled his fists and gnashed his teeth as he spoke about his hatred.
This tiny, flickering wisp of existence, which barely had the right to even be called an entity, cursed the world and the gods as it spoke with the unimaginably large existence that listened patiently.
The vast ocean listened to the lamentations of a tiny drop. Its problems sounded beyond trivial. Its rage barely a spark before the suppressed volcano, yet the ocean patiently listened to the drop, all the while consoling through fabricated touch, scent and warmth. This lasted until finally Wolf ran out of steam and his telling ended.
When Wolf finally went silent, the feminine voice spoke softly.
“Poor little thing. Going through so much suffering,” she-he said then paused for a moment.
“Thank you for sharing. In turn I will tell you my own story. I will keep it short and simple, since telling the whole thing would take far too long–” she-he held back from finishing her-his sentence with for a wisp such as yourself.
“In the distant past Parent and her-his kin helped a group of strangers. They took them in and nourished them. Yet as soon as they turned their backs to these traitorous vipers, they were attacked. Parent and her-his kin were mighty, but they lived far apart and their enemies outnumbered them. To make matters worse, apparently one of their number sold them out and helped the attackers in a bid to preserve its own existence.
“I personally witnessed what happened to Parent. She-he was sneak attacked, instantly getting wounded by those dogs. The wound wasn’t too serious, but no matter how light, it was still a wound. Eldest sister-brother in her-his moment of outrage stepped forth to defend Parent. Only to be instantly exterminated. To those that could wound Parent we were no more than specks of dust. Snacks at most.
“With my current wisdom and knowledge, I realize that those actions were empty bravado. Yet I understand how Eldest thought and why she-he did what she-he did, and I don’t think she-he was wrong. However, at that time I was utterly shocked. My eldest sister-brother, the mightiest of us, died without being able to put up resistance. In a conflict of that level she-he was no different from a child stumbling around blindly, looking for death. The only thing Eldest managed to achieve was to further distract Parent and quicken her-his demise.
“At that moment Parent shouted for us to leave. My elder sister-brother vanished as soon as Parent shouted, shocking me even further. Old Two was not the strongest of us, but she-he was the wisest by far.
“Myself and my younger sister-brother were stunned by what had happened. Our elder sister-brother abandoned us and Parent without batting an eye. But then our enemies turned away from Parent, and they attacked the two of us with all their might.
“I still shudder when I remember that raging surge of energy crashing down towards me. If not for Parent’s intervention, Old Four and I would have perished in body and soul. I don’t even know if Uncle would have been able to restore us,” she-he said while doubting a senior’s ability. “But Parent did intervene. She-he moved faster than light and blocked those blows with her-his own body.
“It was only then that we realized why Old Two had done what she-he did. Parent’s heavy wounds snapped us back to reality, and we started fleeing with everything we had. Among the four of us, Eldest was the strongest, while Old Two was the quickest of wit. Compared with them, Old Four and I were sorely lacking. It was due to the weakness of our bodies and minds that Parent was gravely wounded and ultimately perished. Yet Parent still looked at us with benevolent eyes as she-he urged us to flee with her-his gaze.
“So we did the only thing we could. We fled. And yet, even with such a trivial task before us we acted incompetently. In our panic, Old Four and I separated, not paying attention to where the other was going. I ended up wandering until I came across a place where I was given shelter.
“I don’t have information on what happened with the others. I know that everyone, save for the traitor and the one that is untouchable, is now gone. I’m guessing that the rest did as Parent and desperately struggled in order to buy time for their children and servants to flee.
“But, that is beside the point. What I’m trying to get across is that I too have gone through the same phases of hatred and self loathing you are going through now. I was looking for a villain I could blame, for something or someone I could vent on. However, that is not fair. I clearly know who the villains are, yet in my powerlessness I tried to harm myself and others in order to make myself feel better.
“You should never do this. Fortunately, I was saved. I found those that needed help and I aided them, hoping that one day the karma I sowed would bear fruit. I wish the same for our attackers. We were kind, and yet we got such cruelty in return. I wish for a harbinger of karma to visit them, and I know that one day it will happen. Even though my previous attempts didn’t bear fruit, all I have to do is stay alive long enough. But that’s not important now.
“I wish to share with you the cure that healed me to an extent–” The gentle voice abruptly halted.
The entity’s mind was suddenly assailed by telepathic shouts.
What are you doing!? You’re no more than a guest here! A pathetic refugee! Don’t meddle!
Look! You’re calming him down! We need his rage! His passion! His hatred!
NO! The entity explored in rage.
I AM THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE DEMANDING AN EXPLANATION! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING YOU IMPOTENT MANIAC!
YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE AN OBSERVER!
YOU REFINED THE SOUL OF THE CANDIDATE’S FATHER AND IMPRINTED IT INTO HIS MIND! ARE YOU INSANE!?
YOU ALMOST SHATTERED THIS WISP’S MIND COMPLETELY, AND I DO NOT MEAN JUST EMOTIONALLY!
WHAT YOU HAVE DONE IS DIRECTLY AGAINST YOUR MASTER’S ORDERS!
REMEMBER YOUR PLACE SERVANT!
EVEN THOUGH I AM NO MORE THAN A GUEST YOU SHOULD MIND OUR SENIORITY! EVEN YOUR MAKER WOULD’VE ADDRESSED ME AS SENIOR IF IT STILL EXISTED!
The first voice calmed down and sent its thoughts in a flat monotone voice.
Don’t use that voice with me. I’m still acting civil. Everything I do I do for Master.
The feminine voice also seemed to take a step back.
This is the seventh candidate in eleven billion years. She-he sent. Eleven billion years! And barely half of them managed to fulfill the criteria in the end. I cannot let you break him with such a stupid stunt.
This exchange happened so rapidly that the voice barely faltered before it continued her-his conversation with Wolf.
“– In fact I will do even more than that,” the feminine voice continued. “I have a creature with me. It is completely helpless with no next of kin. It is all alone in the world, just like yourself. Take care of it and one day it will serve you well. It will love you like a brother and respect you like a father.”
With those words a silver egg, big enough to fit a large cat, appeared in front of Wolf.
The boy gingerly reached out to touch it.
Warm. Under Wolf’s fingers the egg felt wonderfully warm. A moment later he felt a faint heartbeat. He didn’t know why, but Wolf could feel the purity and innocence of the creature sleeping inside the egg and unwittingly smiled.
What do you think you are doing? That thing can’t hatch here! Who’s going to feed it? The monotone voice lost a bit of its monotone nature.
The owner of the feminine voice snorted in her mind. She was furious with the way things were developing. The silver lining was that the wisp in front of her immediately felt kinship with her-his offspring.
I would not have been forced to do this if not for your meddling, she-he barely held back her-his rage. I will provide all of the food for this child, so you do not have to worry about the energy required to raise her-him.
You better, your kind eats a ton. The other party grumbled, but seemed to come to terms with the situation.
Author’s note:
The family members of the feminine voice have both sexes, thus both genders in everything. At some point one of the feminine voice’s elders was labeled as an IT, meaning it has no biological sex. Times being are what they are, I’m afraid of inventing new pronouns, as it might get me shot, so we’ll be going forward this anatomically correct, albeit dumb naming convention.
