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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 23

Published at 18th of July 2022 06:34:35 AM


Chapter 23

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“Hey, what’s going on? Why didn’t Hinowa even look at Seita when he called out to her?” Shinpachi asked as he looked at Kawaki and Tsukuyo.

“Ah, there’s actually a reason for this…” Kawaki smiled in embarrassment.

“What is the reason?”

“Before, Hinowa said something like [It’s boring to stay at a high place every day~]. Then, I bought her a pair of invisible wireless earphones, high-security sound effects, and three-dimensional 3D sounds, completely isolating the outside world. With it, the whole world is only you! I don’t want 98,000 right now, and I don’t want 58,000 either. You can bring it home as long as you give 18,888! Young man, it’s better to be tempted…” Before Kawaki could finish, he was kicked over by Shinpachi.

“So it’s all your fault!”

“What do you mean it’s all my fault! It’s just that the author forgot about Seita! Now you want me to fill the pit! It’s all the author’s fault!” Kawaki retorted.



“You are doing that for the sake of meeting your mother. Do you think your mother will like it?” Otose said as she smoked.

Seita wiped away his tears and looked at Otose.

“Come and work here. I can’t give you the money to see a Yoshiwara woman. But I can help you out a little. Just don’t ever pickpockets again.” After Otose finished speaking, Seita’s eyes could not help but turn red again.

“Thank you so much…”



At night, Seita was dragged by Shinpachi to take a bath and then fell asleep upstairs.

Downstairs, in the Snack House, Kawaki, Tsukuyo, Shinpachi, Kagura, and Gintoki were discussing plans in front of the bar.

“… In the end, the hero Seita defeated the Devil Night King and finally met his mother!” After Kawaki finished speaking, he couldn’t help but be moved to tears, “How is this plan? It is definitely the best RPG game of this year!”

“It’s rotten to the point of scum! What a vulgar plot! The RPG game plot you designed since you were a child is as bad as shit!” Gintoki couldn’t help but roar.

“I think my role can be a little richer-aru. For example, if I let Seita collect enough vinegar kelp, he can get Kagura-chan’s help. This way, the plot will be more perfect for aru.” Kagura said from the side.

“It should be modified like this…” Gintoki began to write on the paper.

“This place also needs to be changed…” Shinpachi took the pen and said.

“This place also needs to…”

“This place is also…”



Thus, a rotten script called [Seita – Agarwood – Black Zetsu save mother] was officially completed…

“Hey, it seems to be even worse!” After reading the script, Kawaki couldn’t help but shout.

“I really didn’t expect that the heir of the Night King, Housen, was actually such a person.” Otose looked at Kawaki and couldn’t help but sigh.

“Then, Auntie, I’ll leave Seita to you during this time~,” Kawaki said as he took out an envelope from his body and handed it to Otose.

However, Otose did not accept the envelope, “No need, I can relax a little with the help of a little brat.”

“Thank you very much.” Kawaki put his palms together and said.



Unknowingly, a period of time had passed. Seita was now a completely different person. His entire body began to become clean, and his eyes became gentle. The entire transformation was a great success! Next, there was only…

“Today, the plan will officially begin. The actors in Yoshiwara are already in position. You all have to memorize the lines.” Kawaki couldn’t help but remind him.

“Hey, hey, I didn’t expect that one day I would have to play house with a child. What a fiery little brat.” Gintoki glanced at Kawaki and said.

“What are you talking about? Gintoki, I remember that your character when you were a child is bad.”

“No matter how you compare it, Seita is much cuter than you were when you were a child,” Kawaki replied.

“Hey, did Kawaki-san and Gin-san know each other when they were young?” Shinpachi asked curiously.

“Yes, Gintoki has always been like this since he was a child. He always picks his nose. I didn’t expect that he would have his pick nose for 20 years. I don’t know how big a piece of booger can be picked for 20 years.” Kawaki replied.

“I can’t imagine it.” Shinpachi lamented, “Gin-san’s nostrils might be like a black hole. It unconsciously sucked Gin-san’s hand in, and he could not get rid of it for twenty years.”

“Do you think so too?! Haha, I think so too. It’s hard to imagine what a person would become if he could hold his nose for twenty years. But when I see Gintoki, I understand. After twenty years, his nose will become like his, a naturally wavy silver hair with no energy at all.” Just as Kawaki finished speaking. He felt a chill behind him, and it was getting heavier and heavier.

“You two apologize to all the silver-haired naturally wavy hair! Ah, no, apologize to my nostrils!” As Gintoki spoke, he had already pressed Shinpachi and Kawaki’s heads onto the table.



[Foreign Voice]: The hero, Seita, who had gathered his companions(silver-haired naturally wavy hair, glasses in human skin, and vinegar kelp belt girls), finally came to Yoshiwara. Tonight, whether he could walk to the last checkpoint and defeat the Demon King(Night King). In order to save my mother, let’s wait and see. Now, let’s start with Commercials~

(Commercial time…)



“Can you really do it? Gin-san, I feel a little scared…”

Seita kept looking around, afraid that something bad would happen.

At this time, Seita and Yorozuya had sneaked into Yoshiwara(Kawaki deliberately let them in). It should be said that they had just entered the gate.

“We will definitely let you see your mother! Don’t worry about aru!” Kagura said confidently as she patted her chest.

However, just as she finished speaking, Kagura cried out in alarm, “Ah! I’ve encountered a trap-aru! Right now, only a hundred vinegar kelp can save me! Hurry up! The place where the vinegar kelp is placed is right below the stone slab two hundred meters in front of you-aru!”

“Trap? What trap? Why did I not see anything! Could it be that you were poisoned? Then why are we fine? And why is the vinegar kelp able to detoxify? Why is there vinegar kelp under the stone slab two hundred meters away? Why do you know? There are too many slabs! I don’t even know where to start cursing!” Seita was confused.

“It’s because Kagura-chan is not an Earthling. This poison is only targeted at Kagura-chan, so we are fine. Moreover, Kagura-chan has the ability to detect the position of all the vinegar kelp within two hundred meters.” Shinpachi finally recovered with great difficulty.

“Really?” Seita asked uncertainly.

“It’s true, of course it’s true! Yes! Hurry up and go, hero! I’ll leave the task of saving Kagura-chan to you!” Gintoki patted Seita on the shoulder and said.

“Alright… alright.” As Seita spoke, he began to tentatively walk in the direction that Kagura pointed.

“Hey, Kagura-chan, your acting skills are too bad! It wasn’t easy for me to help you cover up this lie. Next time, at least find an acceptable reason!” Shinpachi murmured to Kagura who was lying on the ground, “Kagura, Kagura? Kagura! Why are you asleep? Hey!”

“I brought back the vinegar kelp. Hurry up and detoxify it, Sister Kagura!” At this time, Seita had already rushed back with the vinegar kelp he had found.

However, at this time, Kagura was still snoring…

Gintoki kicked Kagura quietly. Kagura finally rubbed her eyes and stood up, “Where is this place? Is it time for lunch?”

“This is… Is this a poison that can confuse one’s memory?” Seita’s eyes were watery, “She actually did this for me, for me…”

Gintoki, “…”

Shinpachi, “…”

Just like that, the four of them began to challenge one after another checkpoint (such as collecting two bottles of strawberry milk to save the suddenly depressed Gintoki, or wiping Shinpachi’s glasses to wake up the sleeping Shinpachi, and then collecting two lace panties on the ground to defeat a Hyakka member, collecting three pieces to recruit a Hyakka member for their own use… etc.) Although there were dangers everywhere, they finally arrived at the home of the final boss, the Night King.

At this time, the Night King(Kawaki) was trying hard to memorize the lines…

“Gin-san, we finally came here! Hurry up! We…” Seita said happily. However, just as he finished speaking, Kawaki had already arrived behind Seita. He kicked Gintoki, Kagura, and Shinpachi away. The three of them instantly fell to the ground and spat out blood.

“Gin-san! Sister Kagura! Brother Shinpachi!” Seita exclaimed.

“You’re quite capable. You actually came here. Little brat, you have the qualifications to challenge me! As long as you can defeat me, Night King Kawa… Housen, you will be able to see your mother! Come! PS: Collect more than a hundred pieces of braised meat on the ground. If you feed it to Night King, you can win without fighting,” Kawaki said.

“What kind of setting is this” Although he was complaining, Seita still did it. He lifted the plates on the ground and threw the braised pork to Kawaki one by one. Kawaki did not waste it at all and swallowed it all.

Finally, one hundred…

“Great hero! I didn’t expect that you could… defeat me, Kawa… Housen, your mother is waiting for you behind the door… Go!” After saying that, Kawaki also fell to the ground in an instant and hit GG. At the same time, he spat out blood(tomato juice).

In the end, after a touching reunion, the whole performance ended…

“Brat, since you defeated me, then the title of Night King will be handed over to you!” Kawaki got up and wiped the tomato juice from his mouth, “The whole Yoshiwara will be handed over to you!” After that, Kawaki turned around and was about to leave.

However, Tsukuyo didn’t give Kawaki a chance. She hit Kawaki with kunai several times in an instant. Kawaki fell to the ground again, but this time, he might really be GG.

“Don’t add a play for yourself without permission! You bastard!” Tsukuyo scolded.

“I just think that the plot is more reasonable if I say this.” Kawaki crawled up and said, “And this little brat will definitely become an outstanding Night King. I believe in him!”

“Believe your head!”

“What, what exactly is going on?” Seita rubbed his swollen eyes and asked.

Finally, after learning the truth, Seita couldn’t help but laugh.

“When humans are controlled by emotions, humans at this time will not consider the rationality of the situation at all. Although it may sound stupid and funny after the event, I always think that this is one of the highlights of humans.” Kawaki rubbed Seita’s hair, “You have to remember it well, little brat.”

“What’s the use of saying such philosophical words at the end? Reward! Reward! Quickly hand over the reward!” Gintoki said as he kicked Kawaki over.

“Ah, here, three copies for each person.” Kawaki got up and took out three envelopes, each with the names of Yorozuya members.

“So thick…” Gintoki took his share, “This must be a million!”

“Thank you, Kawaki-san!” Shinpachi said as he took the envelope.

“I can buy a lot of vinegar kelt with it-aru!” Kagura said jumping up and down.

However, when the three of them opened the envelope, their expressions were completely different. Gintoki’s envelopes were filled with denominations of 1,000 yen, and the envelopes of Shinpachi and Kagura-chan were filled with denominations of 10,000 yen.

“Why do I have the least!”




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