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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 55

Published at 18th of July 2022 06:33:49 AM


Chapter 55

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“Kagura-chan, are you alright? Don’t try to be brave…” As he spoke, Shinpachi looked at Kagura who was at the side.

“It’s alright-aru… As long as I have an umbrella, it doesn’t matter…” Kagura replied weakly. As she spoke, she stood up, “I’m just a little thirsty. I’ll go to the river over there to drink some water…”

Looking at Kagura who was walking into the distance, Shinpachi finally reacted. He shouted at Kagura, “River? No, wait! Don’t cross over to the other side!”

(Note: According to Japanese legend, people will reach the underworld by crossing the Sanzu River within seven days after their death. )

As he spoke, Shinpachi rushed forward and pounced on Kagura, stopping her.

“Daddy… give me a break…” Kagura looked up and said weakly, “I have enough boxing… I really want to drink water…”

“Who is your daddy!” Shinpachi groaned and looked at Gintoki and Kawaki behind him, “Gin-san, Kawaki-san, bad news. Kagura is about to cross the Sanzu River!”

“That kind of thing is just to coax children,” Kawaki stood up, at the same time carrying the already hot Seita on his back and shouting at Kagura, “Kagura, come here, let’s go to the old lady on the bridge over there and ask for a bowl of iced mung bean soup.”

“Hey! That’s about the same for you!” Shinpachi shouted.

“That’s the thing you used to coax children, right?” Gintoki said with disdain. At the same time, he walked in front of Kagura and patted her face, “Hey, Kagura, wake up…”

“Idiot daddy, I’d better continue boxing…” Kagura, whose eyes were lifeless, was still immersed in her fantasy.

“This won’t do. Her eyes are lifeless.” Gintoki looked into Kagura’s eyes and said. At the same time, he bent down and carried Kagura on his back, “I’ll carry her to the river over there to drink some water…”

As he spoke, he began to walk toward the other side.

“Hey! You see it too” Shinpachi hurriedly grabbed the two of them.

“What are you shouting for? Can’t you see?” Gintoki retorted, “Ah, there’s still a flower garden…”

At this time, Sakamoto staggered over and pointed at Gintoki. “Oh! Isn’t this Oryo-chan? Marry me…”

“Why are you guys dying so quickly!”

Gintoki was going to the Sanzu River, Kawaki was going to look for Grandma Meng, and Shinpachi stood in place, feeling bad.

However, at this moment, a passenger pointed to the sky and shouted, “What, what is that?!”

Then, everyone raised their heads and looked at the little black dot that was getting bigger and bigger. The little black dot was getting bigger and bigger, and it was getting closer and closer. As time passed, it finally revealed a complete outline. It was three spaceships!

“It’s the spaceship! Someone is coming to save us!” A passenger shouted loudly.

The other passengers also cheered happily…

After the spaceship landed, Sakamoto scratched his head in embarrassment and said, “Hahaha, I’ve really troubled you, Mutsu. You ran so far to pick me up…”

“And it’ll be the last time I do,” Mutsu replied somewhat helplessly, “Our ship is used for business, not for rescue teams. As the boss, you are always like this. Our brothers are in a difficult position. Moreover, this better be the last time you go wandering off without telling us.”

“I’m really sorry. I really like women from Earth.”

“You are really annoying. Why aren’t you dead yet…”

“Haha, Mutsu, you have a bad mouth.”

“Sakamoto-san, this is…” Shinpachi rubbed his glasses and looked at the large spaceships then asked.

“Oh, it’s called [Kaientai]. It can be considered my private fleet…”



At this time, all the passengers had boarded the Kaientai ship, while Sakamoto took Shinpachi to tour the cabin.

“This ship is not for battle. The fleet itself is my company.” Sakamoto explained.

“Company?”

“That’s right, I’m driving this ship to do some large-scale business and sell items on various planets. In other words, we’re traders. “As they spoke, the two of them had already arrived outside the cabin. Sakamoto glanced at the shiny metal barrel on the ship and continued,” But the universe hasn’t been very peaceful recently, so it’s equipped with some equipment like this. ”

“Sakamoto, it seems that you are not a little stupid.” Shinpachi leaned on the guardrail and sighed.

“Aha ha ha ha, why are you praising me so much that I want to cry…” Sakamoto was a little speechless, but he still continued to say, “What can influence people’s hearts is not force or thinking, but interests. If you bring benefits to Amanto and the people on Earth, you can ask for a balanced relationship. I just want to guard my home according to my own idea.”

“That’s impressive,” Shinpachi lamented. Then, he turned to look at Gintoki, who was feeding Kagura water with a wooden bucket. He sighed and continued, “Our boss has always been so sloppy.”

“Ahahaha, that guy is really like that. No, it’s not that guy. It’s those two guys,” Sakamoto said and looked at Kawaki, who was snoring softly, “However, I feel that nothing has changed when I see the two of them. They are exactly the same as before… Some things on them are the same. Although I don’t understand, I can understand…”

Suddenly, Sakamoto seemed to have thought of something, “Ah right, Kawaki asked…”

However, at this moment, a green tentacle wrapped around Sakamoto and pulled him out. It was only then that Shinpachi realized that many staff members of the Kaientai were in a similar situation…

“That is…!” Shinpachi shouted in disbelief.

“Hahaha, looks like the weather is still too hot. I’m hallucinating again…” Sakamoto, who had been kidnapped by the tentacles, still had an indifferent expression on his face, “Don’t mind it, it’s just an illusion…”

“What is that?!”

“Monster!”

A few staff members in the cabin pointed at the countless green tentacles that came out of the sand and panicked.

“What exactly is that…”

“It’s sandworms,” Mutsu came over and answered Shinpachi’s confusion, “It’s the creature at the top of the food chain on this planet. It should have been a quiet guy. It probably woke up because a group of people quarreled in the desert.”

“I say! Why are you still so calm when your boss is in such big trouble!”

“It was him who always acted rashly and made himself suffer.” As he spoke, Mutsu shouted at the tentacles, “Sandworm! Kill that unkempt man, and the lower body is the focus of the attack. ”

“Do you have any deep hatred…”

“Hahaha, how could I die in such a place” As he spoke, Sakamoto took out his gun and saved his companions who had encountered the same situation as him, but he did not save himself.

“Everyone, run!” Sakamoto shouted.

The Kaientai member who fell to the ground quickly ran to the spaceship.

At this moment, a huge creature with a hard shell came out of the sand. It must be the sandworm that Mutsu had mentioned. At the same time, the whole ship began to shake violently.

Looking at the sandworms that were bigger than the combined size of the three spaceships, Shinpachi could not help but panic, “H-Here it comes!”

The sandworms stretched out several tentacles and wrapped the entire fleet.

“Bastard! It intends to drag all the boats into the sand!” Mutsu cursed.

“Use the cannons! Use the cannons to kill it!” Sakamoto shouted.

“If you fire, Sakamoto-san, you would be killed too…” Shinpachi shouted.

“Don’t worry about me!”

“But, Sakamoto-san…”

Before Shinpachi could finish, Mutsu ordered, “Prepare to fire!”

At the same time, everyone obeyed and aimed their cannons at the sandworms.

“I say, are you really going to kill Sakamoto” Shinpachi shouted angrily, “Isn’t he the captain?”

“[Never lose sight of your duty], I must not put all the passengers in danger for that guy alone. What I should do now is to save the lives of all the passengers!” After speaking, Mutsu turned his head to look at Shinpachi, “[Never lose sight of your duty] is that guy’s mantra. That guy left his comrades who were fighting on the ground in the war against Amanto and went to space, why do you think he did this? It was for the sake of duty, he was thinking about the future of the country. The painful choice in the end was, of course, really painful, and the war ended after he went to space…”

“Even though he was in so much pain at that time, he still continued to make his own decisions. We were attracted by him and gathered here. Therefore, we must not do anything against his life creed!”

“Ready to fire!” a staff member shouted.

“Fire!” Mutsu shouted, and at the same time, two laser beams shot at the sandworm.

The huge explosion not only successfully scared the sandworm into the sand but also woke up Kawaki who was at the side.

Looking at Sakamoto who was about to be pulled into the sand, Kawaki stood up reluctantly, “Hey, it’s so hard to get a rest. What are you doing?”

“Kawaki-san! Hurry up and save Sakamoto-san!” Shinpachi asked Kawaki for help as if he was grasping at a life-saving straw.

“Ah? How can that snail threaten Sakamoto? Are you joking?” Although Kawaki said this, he still jumped onto the cannon barrel. At the same time, Gintoki also moved.

“Hey, that… snail, let go of Sakamoto…” Kawaki took out a loudspeaker made of cardboard from somewhere and shouted at the sandworm, “That… Think about your old mother in your home. She will definitely cry when she knows that you have done this kind of thing, right?”

“Hey! Is this method effective” Shinpachi shouted from below.

“Didn’t I tell you? That guy is an idiot!” Gintoki also shouted.

“Gin-san…” Shinpachi wanted to be moved for a while, but when he heard the second half of Gintoki’s words, he was not moved at all.

“That’s obviously a conch!” Gintoki said disdainfully.

“Hey! The two of you are going overboard one by one!” Shinpachi was in a bad mood.

“Really?” Kawaki scratched his head and then shouted to the sandworm, “That… big conch, let go of Sakamoto. Think about your old mother in your home. She will definitely cry when she knows that you have done this kind of thing. She will definitely cry…”

“Ahahaha, I think I must die this time.” At this time, Sakamoto only had his head exposed.

“Oi, didn’t I tell you to let go of Sakamoto?” Kawaki’s tone suddenly changed, and everyone who heard it felt as if they were in cold winter and shivering.

“What… what’s going on…” After a long while, Shinpachi finally woke up from his shock.

“It’s a killing intent,” Mutsu explained and looked at Kawaki, who was smiling but did not have any emotions, “That umbrella…”

However, at this time, Sakamoto was finally sent out by the sandworm, and the sandworms also escaped into the sand.

“The killing intent made the sandworm obedient. It seems that the rumors are true…” Mutsu murmured.

“Hahaha, it’s still the same as before.” Sakamoto lay on the sand and muttered to himself, “I’ve always wanted to say something to you guys. Sorry, I abandoned you guys at the last moment…”

“What are you talking about?” Kawaki jumped down and helped Sakamoto up. He said disdainfully, “For men of your level, it’s not much to have one more person like you.”

“You’re right, it’s just that your voice is loud,” Said Gintoki, who was supporting Sakamoto from the other side.

“However, if you fall to the ground at this level, I will look down on you, Sakamoto.” Kawaki continued.

“What big talk are you talking about?” Gintoki also muttered in disdain.

“However, we will always be on the ground, supporting you with your [Duty].” × 2

“You…” As he spoke, Sakamoto was so moved that tears and snot gushed out at the same time, and he hugged the two of them and rubbed them together madly.

“So dirty! And, so smelly!”

“Get lost!”

“Wu, I’m just moved~”



Looking at the three of them, Mutsu raised the corner of his mouth but said nothing.



“This, the thing you asked me to get in the past.” Sakamoto said as he threw a stone at Kawaki, “Your hometown, Planet Heiwa’s fragment. Although the whole Planet Heiwa is gone, I still found some.”

“Ah, I almost forgot.” Holding the fist-sized stone, Kawaki said casually and turned to throw the stone at Seita.

“I knew what you were thinking at first…” After saying that, Kawaki walked to the side, sat down, and closed his eyes again.

“This is…” Seita hugged the stone and muttered.

“Looks like the plan has been exposed.” Tsukuyo took a puff and said.

“Plan?” Shinpachi was puzzled.

“Well, let Kawaki-san take a look at his home planet plan…” Seita answered honestly.

“Hey, I heard from Zura that you are now in Yoshiwara. Hey! Don’t be silent! At least give some points cards or coupons to your former friends! Hey!”



(Sakamoto Tatsuma’s debut is finished!)




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